Thirty-six hours ago, I had no idea what FOMO meant. I had never heard the term. But once my daughter explained it to me, I realized that in some way or another, we all suffer from FOMO. This is the virus of the 21st century, and the reason why most of us cannot put down our phones.
The way she explained it to me was that this kid could not put down his phone because he was afraid to miss a text message or an Instagram picture or a Facebook post. He was fearful that if he disconnected from his phone for longer than five minutes, he would miss out on the ultimate plan for the weekend or on the greatest gossip of the day. Sound familiar?
Social media has become a virus and most of us are not immune to it. Many of us have been attacked by the FOMO virus. The first symptom crops up in the morning. If the first thing we do when we wake up is grab our phone, chances are that we have been infected. In that first hour of the morning we go through a frenzy stage. We check our emails, our text messages, our Facebook accounts, our Instagram.... What did we miss out while we were sleeping? Yes, we are definitely suffering from FOMO.
I recently read an article titled “Ten Morning Habits to Start your Day Off Right.” (https://chopra.com/articles/10-morning-habits-to-start-your-day-off-right). The very first habit was: “Stay unplugged from tech.” It said that “If the first thing you do when you wake up is check your smartphone for messages or work email, you are doing yourself a disservice. You are immediately cultivating a reactive mindset, instead of a proactive one, which will cause you to start your day in a defensive state, rather than a place of inner peace and control. Instead, try remaining detached from technology for the first hour of your day so you can begin your day with present-moment awareness and a positive focus.” Easier said than done.
Last year, during Lent, I decided to give up Facebook. The reason I chose this was because I realized that I was becoming addicted. I did not know that my addiction had a name, but now in retrospect, I know that I was definitely suffering from a bad case of FOMO. The first thing I did when I woke up was scroll through my news feed. I would crave knowing what people where up to, where they went on the weekend, who’s kid had gotten married, where they went on vacation, what restaurants were popular, etc. I tried to cover my addiction by claiming that I used social media to keep up with friends and for my spirituality. Even though that is true to a certain degree, the bottom line is that more than anything I was using it for fear of missing out. What I did not realize at the time was that due to this FOMO virus, I was truly missing out. I was spending more time checking people through Facebook than truly connecting with them on a personal level. Giving up Facebook for Lent was the best decision that I ever made. At first it was difficult. I guess I had withdrawal symptoms. But after a while, I stopped missing it and I felt liberated. Even though I did go back to it after Lent, I don’t feel addicted to it anymore. Sometimes more than a week goes by, and I haven’t even logged into my Facebook account. Am I missing out? Probably. Does it matter? Definitely not. I am not missing out from the important things. And who cares what anyone did on the weekend, where they went on vacation or what restaurant they frequent. It is more important to spend time with friends in person than through a screen.
If just like me this is the first time you hear the term FOMO, don’t think that this is a virus that only affects the millennials. It may have started with them but it has certainly propagated to all the generations. While we were at the restaurant last night, I looked around me, and while in some tables some people were actually deep in conversation, there were many others that were spending more time on the phone than interacting. I have seen young couples who are obviously on a date, paying more attention to their phones than to each other. I have also seen senior citizens hooked to their smart phones. Some restaurants have implemented the idea of tech-free dinners. They have placed a box on the tables with creative signs that say something like “Disconnect to Re-Connect” or something as simple as “We’d like to invite you to unplug during your meal.” In Singapore, McDonald’s launched a campaign titled “Phone Off, Fun On.” They have set up mobile phone lockers at their restaurants so customers can stow away their devices during mealtime.
Now that I know that this tech addiction has a name, I think I’m going to copy the restaurants initiative and place a phone drop-off box in my home. I will call this box JOMO... the joy of missing out.
Copyright © 2019 Christy Romero. All rights reserved.
