2021: A Mixed Suitcase

When my son Rafi started high school, he went on a trip to Spain with his school. We had a parents’ meeting before the trip, and amidst many of the instructions given to us, we were told to pack a change of clothing in the carry-on. The reason being that if the main luggage was lost, at least they would have extra clothes until it was found. I took this suggestion to heart, and when I’ve had to check in luggage, I’ve always packed a change of clothing inside my carry-on. I call it my mixed suitcase because it contains a little bit of everything. However, I have always packed my toiletries in its own separate carry-on suitcase. Those were never to be mixed with the clothes—that is, until now. 

On my unexpected trip to the mountains, I forgot the toiletries bag at my daughter’s house. I didn’t realize this until I finished putting away all our clothes. It was almost five o’clock when it dawned on me that not only was I missing the toiletries, but also all our prescription medications. This meant we would have to drive back to Charlotte. 

When I look back at my years, I tend to categorize them as either a terrible year or a wonderful year.  But as I look back at 2021, I have decided to classify it as a mixed suitcase kind of year. This year had a mixture of horrendous and wonderful events. 

We started the year with Covid. Both Alex and Keely entered 2021 testing positive. In mid January, Rafi and Emily came to visit for two weeks and we were able to be all together for the first time in over a year. We then got the vaccine so that gave us some hope that maybe this was the beginning of the end for this pandemic. 

On Mother’s Day, the year peaked with the wonderful news that we were going to become grandparents. And then, it collapsed in June when we lost six friends in the Surfside tragedy. 

Alex, Keely, Daniel and Chabeli moved to Charlotte this year. We are now all spread out from New York to Miami, but we were able to travel plenty between all three cities to visit all our kids. We definitely saw more of them in 2021 than we did in 2020, so distance was not an obstacle. 

Another marvelous thing that happened in this mixed suitcase year is that I finished the book that I began to write back in 2007. Not only did I finish it, but I hired an editor and I have the finished manuscript ready to be sent out to publishers. The next step… let’s just say I’ll leave it in God’s hands.

We attended a beautiful wedding in New Hampshire, celebrated my mom’s 80th birthday, went to more funerals than we would have liked, but celebrated life with the birth of Benedict on November 2nd. By far, his birth was the highlight of this mixed year, taking it to a higher level of marvelous. We met him on November 10th, and the feeling of joy that I felt when I met this little boy, son of my son, can only be understood by another grandparent. In one sweeping motion, all the horrible events of the year were erased. 

Even though the year did not end in New York as we had planned, we were able to spend a week in North Carolina with our younger kids. And as I reflect on this mixed up year, I realize that I have so much to be thankful for. It also hit me that even on those years that I labeled as horrible, I also had a lot to be grateful for. All years, if we truly look at them, are made up of mixed events, some good and some bad. It’s up to us to succumb to the bad or rise up with the good. 

As we started our drive back to Charlotte to retrieve our toiletries and medications, I was able to get a hold of our doctor. He called in our prescriptions to a nearby pharmacy. We bought all the important toiletries, picked up the meds, avoided seven hours of driving back and forth, and had an amazing three days celebrating Christmas on the mountains. I did not have my face creams, but I survived, and I learned that in order to be prepared, I must always pack a mixed suitcase. 

Even though 2022 will also arrive with a mixed suitcase because the pandemic is not over, may the marvelous events overshadow the horrible ones. Grab on to all the good, and don’t succumb to the bad. And if you forget the toiletries… don’t despair. There are drugstores everywhere. 

Copyright © 2021 Christy Romero. All rights reserved.

Expect the Unexpected

“This Christmas expect the unexpected, say a little prayer to St. Joseph, and go with the flow. When things turn upside down, you’ll smile and not frown.” Bishop William Byrne

Today, I was supposed to be in a plane headed to New York. Instead, I’m in a car on my way to Charlotte, NC. How did this happen? I’m not sure. I’m still trying to wrap my head around this sudden change of plans. It should not surprise me, though. Ever since Covid started, I’ve been living a very unexpected life, just like everyone else in the world. 

St. Joseph is one of my favorite saints. Aside from the obvious—he was Mary’s husband and Jesus’ earthly father—, he was also unassuming, quiet, strong, wise, and trusting. This last trait is what places him in my list of favorites. I admire how he trusted God completely. He trusted God when the angel appeared to him in a dream, and told him to marry Mary even though he had just found out that she was pregnant, and he was not the father. He trusted when he had to go to Bethlehem with Mary just a few weeks before her due date. He trusted God when they couldn’t find a place at the inn. He trusted when Mary went into labor in a stable. He trusted when God told him to go to Egypt instead of back home to Nazareth. Joseph trusted completely in spite of all the change of plans that God kept sending him. Joseph was the king of the unexpected. 

I need to learn from St. Joseph to go with the flow. I don’t do good with the unexpected. I am a planner to the point that I become a bit OCD. Therefore, when I get hit with curve balls, and my plans are turned upside down, I mope.

Our trip to New York had been planned to the last minute detail: gifts shipped, food for both Christmas Eve and Day ordered, restaurants and activities planned. Hotels and airlines reserved well in advance. And the most important part—all the kids were going to be there. This was what hurt the most. Getting everyone to synchronize their vacations is no easy feat, but for four days, we managed to do just that. Add to that the icing on the cake: this is Benedict’s first Christmas. Benedict, my seven-week-old grandson. I saw him when he was one week old, and I was counting the days until I could see him again. Yes, I was definitely not happy when the unexpected happened. 

Mr. Grinch, once again, came to ruin my Christmas plans. He did it last year, and he did it again. Last year, two of my kids got Covid right before Christmas, so we ended up being just three of us around the table. This year, thank God, nobody is sick. But with Covid cases on the rise, and a newborn in the house, we had a family meeting and decided that it would be best to postpone (not cancel) our trip to New York. This decision was made three days ago so overnight I saw all my plans go up in smoke. I cancelled hotel, airline, food order, restaurant reservations, and then I moped. I gave myself one night of pity party, and by Monday morning I knew I had two options: I could continue moping around or I could turn my frown into a smile, and accept the unexpected. 

My youngest kids were already in New York, so at least they got to see their brand new nephew by meeting up in Central Park and getting a peek of him inside the stroller. Now, they are on their way to Kentucky instead of on the 26th as originally planned. 

My middle kids were supposed to fly from Charlotte to New York yesterday. They canceled their flight. And that’s when we decided to join them in Charlotte. 

My older kids and their baby will be alone in New York, but it’s a sacrifice worth making in order to keep the baby safe in these uncertain times. 

Yesterday, I was still trying to accept the change of plans without frowning, when I received this meditation from Loyola Press:

“We know for a fact that the Holy Family had no reservations, so Joseph had to do some quick thinking. Flexibility is the first ingredient to lowering holiday stress. This Christmas expect the unexpected, say a little prayer to St. Joseph, and go with the flow. When things turn upside down, you’ll smile and not frown.” —Excerpted from 5 Things with Father Bill by Bishop William Byrne

“Wow,” I said to myself. “This was written especially for me.”

St. Joseph, king of the unexpected, please help me turn my frown into a smile. Teach me to trust God the way you did. Show me that God’s plans are always better than my own. And help me to accept the unexpected. 

I prayed to St. Joseph, and for the next twelve days, I will go with the flow. Today, I’m on a 10-hour car ride to Charlotte instead of a 3-hour flight to New York. Tomorrow, we may go to the mountains. Who knows? I’m being flexible. After all, I have no control of this ship. We rented a house on the mountains. Hopefully we’ll spend Christmas there. Or maybe not. God is in control, and at this point, I’m expecting more of the unexpected.

Merry Christmas everyone and remember to add flexibility to your plans 😊

Copyright © 2021 Christy Romero. All rights reserved.