Traversing through the Barren Desert

“They did Him homage and then returned to Jerusalem with great joy.” Luke 24:52

Lately, my spirituality has been very dry. I feel like if I’m walking through a barren desert. I began the

year, with every intention of finishing my book, but I have hardly touched it. Yes, I could blame it on the fact that I have been pretty overwhelmed with remodeling our new apartment, moving, and work, but the bottom line is that my holy inspiration has completely dried off.

Years ago, I read a book titled “When the Well Runs Dry” by Thomas H. Green. It is exactly how I feel. My spiritual well is dry. I am traversing through the barren desert of my inspiration. I have lost it. There is nothing in there. It has dried up.

But sometimes inspiration comes when I’m not even searching for it. I have been mostly fine with sitting back and not writing. I keep telling myself that I am so busy with other things that there is no time to write. At the end of a busy day, I am so exhausted that I just want to lay in bed with a good book, and don’t bother with trying to write. Today, however, inspiration came knocking during mass. We are spending the weekend in Hallandale Beach, so we went to mass at St. Matthew. The pastor, Father Robert Ayala, just returned from a pilgrimage to the Holy Land. He talked about it during mass. And being that today is the feast of the Ascension of our Lord to heaven, he tied the two experiences together.

As he was talking, I could not help but be transported to my Holy Land pilgrimage last year. When he mentioned their journey through the Via Dolorosa, I clearly saw myself carrying that cross through the streets of Jerusalem. I remember that as we were trying to meditate the Stations of the Cross, for many, it was just another regular day in Jerusalem. The locals were not paying any attention to us. They were going about their business of opening up their storefronts to sell to the tourists or they were buying groceries for their families or they were dressed in suits on their way to their jobs. Both Father Willie during our pilgrimage and Father Robert today in his homily, reminded me that it was the same when Jesus was carrying His cross on the way to His crucifixion. It was just another day in Jerusalem.

The day of the Ascension, though, was not just another day. In the first century, people were used to seeing crucifixions, but nobody had seen anyone ascend to heaven. This day, changed the apostles. They were witnesses to a miracle. And as today’s reading points out: “They did Him homage and then returned to Jerusalem with great joy.” Luke 24:52. Even though we were not physically present on that event during the first century, we are also witnesses like the apostles were. One of the sites that impressed me the most during my pilgrimage was precisely the footprint that Jesus left on earth right before He ascended into heaven. I remember that all of us were looking down at the footprint that was imprinted on the rock, and the thought that stroke me was that all of us had the job to be Jesus’ footprint on this earth. The apostles were the first witnesses and they returned to Jerusalem with great joy because they knew that one day, they would follow Jesus into heaven. But in the meantime, they did not stay in their homes sitting back and relaxing waiting for that moment. No, they became Jesus’ hands and feet on earth. They kept moving and they spread His message to all the corners of the world.

It was thanks to the apostles that we have heard about Jesus. If they had stayed inside their homes simply attending to their daily duties, we would not have the gospels today and we would not have received the message of love and hope. Yes, one day, we will also follow Jesus into heaven, but in the meantime, we cannot sit back, relax and do nothing. We are the descendants of the apostles. We are the new witnesses. It is our job to spread His Word on the 21st century just like it was the apostles’ job on the first century.

Therefore, it is time for me to get out of the barren desert, allow the rain of inspiration to refill my well and pick up where I left off. My fixer upper is finished, we have finally moved, and even though I still have a lot to do, that is no excuse to allow the arid bottom of the well to consume me. Next Sunday, we celebrate Pentecost, so I will lift this prayer to the Holy Spirit: “Come Holy Spirit and kindle in my mind the fire of holy inspiration. Allow my mind to be renewed by the fire of your love. Instruct my heart to be able to hear the fire of your Word. And give me the wisdom to spread your message to those that are open to receive it. Amen.”