Step #23-Law or Common Sense

“Jesus said to his disciples: ‘Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill.’” Matthew 5:17

Wednesday of the Third Week of Lent (March 18, 2009)

As we meditate on the scriptures of the New Testament, we can easily think that Jesus did not have any respect for the laws. He went against most of the laws that the Pharisees emphasized so much. He did not respect the Sabbath when He encountered someone in need, therefore the Pharisees accused Him of working on the Sabbath. He forgave the sinners and told the Pharisees, "Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone,” John 8:7, even though the law of Moses said that “women caught in the very act of committing adultery should be stoned.” John 8:4-5

Today, Jesus clarifies it for us. He does not want us to ignore the laws, He just wants us to use common sense when we observe the laws. The Church says that we must go to mass every Sunday and holy days of obligation, however, if my child is sick and I don’t go to mass, will Jesus get upset? I certainly think He would be more upset if I leave my sick child in order to go to mass.

When I was a teenager one of my friends would stop at red lights and if no one was coming, He would just take them. He claimed the red lights were there to avoid accidents, but if no cars were coming in the opposite direction, what was the point of waiting? Today, not surprising, he’s an attorney. The problem with his rationality is the chaos that would be formed if everyone did that. On the other hand, when I was pregnant with my second child, three weeks before my due date I went into labor and without warning, the contractions began less than three minutes apart. Rafael drove to the hospital at 2 o’clock in the morning slowing down for the red lights but taking every single one of them. Both did exactly the same thing, the difference was in the motive.

Jesus does not want us to break the laws, but we need to use common sense into knowing when is better to break a law if it means breaking it may save someone’s life, while sticking to the book like the Pharisees did, will cause us to become heartless towards the needs of those around us. Of course, we also have to keep in mind what law we are breaking and how will that help the person we are breaking it for. Last week, one of my clients who is undergoing financial difficulties, told me “use your magic touch so that I can get the highest possible refund.” My answer was, “I don’t have a magic wand, I have to abide by the law.” Cheating on a tax return to get more money is like “robbing Peter to pay Paul.” I know many persons that think that cheating the IRS is not really cheating because the IRS has enough money. I am sorry to say that cheating the IRS is the same as robbing a neighbor. How will I help a client by cheating if later on he may get audited, have to repay the money plus penalty and risk going to jail?

As we continue on our journey, let’s think about those times we had to break a law to help someone in need. What was our real motive for doing this? If we did it out of love and did not hurt someone else in the process, Jesus looked the other way. However, if we had an ulterior motive, or if we are so adamant to stick to the book and we don’t care who we hurt in the process, maybe we need to have a serious talk with Jesus or our blessed Mother, asking them to guide us to do the right thing.

Wednesday of the Third Week of Lent (March 7, 2018)

Last week, on Friday, I completely forgot that I could not eat meat because it was Lent. I had a chicken Caesar salad for lunch, but right before I ate it, I remembered that we were in Lent. I had a decision to make. Did I throw away the chicken or did I eat it? Everyone in my office agreed that it was better that I ate it instead of throwing it away. I had to agree with them, and I think that in this particular case, Jesus would not have wanted me to stick to the law. Throwing away the chicken when there are so many people without food was not the proper thing to do. So I ate the chicken. Common sense won. Of course, the ideal thing would have been for me to give the chicken to someone in need. But I just did not have that option that day because I could not leave my office.

Following the rules, of both the church and the world, is important, but many times, we need to use our common sense. On the same Friday, at night, we went out to eat. We followed the rules. We did not order meat. Instead, we ordered a delicious seafood pasta with shrimp and lobster. It’s good to be a Catholic during Lent, especially if you like seafood. But common sense tells me that’s not what Lent is supposed to be.

Step #22-Forgiveness through Compassion

“Moved with compassion the master of that servant let him go and forgave him the loan.” Matthew 18:27

Tuesday of the Third Week of Lent (March 17, 2009)

Forgiveness and compassion. These are two of the feelings Jesus asked us to pick up during our journey a few steps back. They certainly go hand in hand. It’s very hard to forgive unless we feel compassion… and it’s very hard to feel compassion towards someone and don’t forgive them.

What happens, though, when we finally find enough compassion in our heart to forgive someone that has done something to us, and eventually that person goes and does exactly the same thing once again? Do you get twice as angry for having forgiven them in the first place? I certainly do and I call myself all sorts of names from jerk to others not so nice.

What happens when we go to confession, Jesus forgives us and eventually we commit the same sin? Does Jesus get twice as angry towards us? Does He regret having forgiven us in the first place? He does not. He forgives us again and again, “not seven times but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18:22

He wants us to do the same. If someone sins against us, we need to forgive and forgive and forgive. Have you been able to forgive that person that you encountered on your journey back on step #11? Jesus asked you to reconcile with that person. You don’t remember? Go back and read step #11. Jesus then talked to us about compassion in step #17. Now He wants us to unite these two steps, feel compassion for that person that keeps being bad and keeps getting on our nerves and once and for all, forgive, forgive, and forgive, as many times as it’s necessary.

Talk to Mary. How was she able to forgive those that crucified her Son? First, she had to find compassion in her heart.

Step #21-Embracing Everyone

“Amen, I say to you, no prophet is accepted in his own native place.” Luke 4:24

Monday of the Third Week of Lent (March 16, 2009)

Do you ever feel like your own family doesn’t take you seriously? The closer you get to God, the weirder they think you are. I have been told in the past that I was becoming a fanatic, that maybe I should become a nun, and so on. Our own family members some times can be the hardest on us because they know us as we used to be and they don’t understand the person God wants us to be, so they can be very cruel.

That is exactly what happened to Jesus in today’s Gospel reading. He was rejected by his own friends, his own family members… they knew Him as a simple carpenter so they could not understand Him as a prophet, the Son of God.

How about us? Do we sometimes do the same thing to others? Yesterday we had a wedding in our family. It was a wedding performed under two different religions and it was absolutely beautiful. The two ministers (one representing the Anglican church and the other one representing the Catholic faith) did a beautiful job of explaining the differences, yet uniting them under the same God. There is only one God and it is the same God for Jewish, Baptist, Anglicans, Methodists, Catholics, etc. We humans are the ones that complicate everything. Most of us know someone close to us that practices a different religion. Do we embrace them or do we reject them?

Jesus wants us to love everyone the same, it does not matter what they practice. He wants us to accept every one for whom they are and if somewhere along the way they start to change, let us accept the new person they are becoming. After all, we also used to be caterpillars and tadpoles and we are in the process of becoming butterflies and frogs. Jesus loved the old us, but He wants us to transform in the beautiful persons we are meant to be.

Step #20-Cleaning our Temple

“Destroy this temple and in three days I will raise it up.” John 2:19

Third Sunday of Lent (March 15, 2009)

Today the Church gives us the choice of two different readings, so it is possible that you heard the reading about the woman of Samaria. In my parish they used the reading about the temple being used as a market place, therefore I will use this reading as the topic for this step.

Jesus gets upset when He arrives at the temple and he sees they are selling all kinds of things, so he overturns the tables and kicks them out. Then He is challenged to give a sign for his action. When He says “Destroy this temple and in three days I will raise it up,” He is actually referring to His own body.

Our own bodies are “temples” and in this journey God is asking us to renew them. It is time to clean out our temples. All those things that we have been accumulating in the closet, is time to take them out and do some serious cleaning.

Lent is the perfect time to do this. Fasting, praying and almsgiving, helps us to see things in a whole different light. We need to take a look at all those things in our temple that we do not like, and throw them out. Once we do, we’ll be able to skip the rest of the way.

Step #19-Bridging the Gap to Reconciliation

Saturday of the Second Week of Lent (March 14, 2009)

Part I-Reconciliation

“Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you; I no longer deserve to be called your son.” Luke 15:21

Today’s gospel reading is about the parable of the Prodigal Son. I am sure that most of us have heard this parable countless times. Every time I read it I get a different message because it can be interpreted from so many different angles. We get a message if we look at it from the point of view of the father, who always forgives no matter what his children do to him. If we analyze it from the perspective of the brother, who got angry at his father for forgiving his selfish son, we can sympathize with him and we understand because we have experienced those feelings of unfairness. Last night when I read it I thought of forgiveness, reconciliation… but this morning, I placed myself in the shoes of the selfish son, because I can relate so well to him.

Many times we fail our parents, our spouse, our children, our family or our friends. We are human therefore we are not perfect. Most likely our parents have always forgiven us no matter how much we have hurt them. Use your imagination to transport yourself to your childhood. Think of something you did as a child which at the time seemed really bad… so bad that you had never seen your parents so angry at you. They probably punished you but in the end, they forgave you because a parent’s love is like that, it doesn’t hold grudges, it always forgives and forgets everything. I am sure if you were to talk about this incident with your parents, if they are still alive, they probably don’t even remember it. Our spouse, our children, our family and our friends probably have a harder time forgiving something we do to them, but not our parents.

Our Father in heaven is just like that. No matter what we do, no matter what we have done in the past, He loves us so much that He will always forgive us… not just forgive us, He forgets. Every time we go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation we are given a blank page to start fresh. The problem is that most of the time we don’t truly believe it. We are harsh with ourselves and even though the Father forgives us, we don’t forgive ourselves. Every time we go to confession, we confess the same sin over and over again, even if we did not commit that same sin again. We forget that we have been forgiven already.

Today, have a deep examination of conscience. Sit under the tree with your blessed Mother, and have a heart to heart. If necessary, take pen and paper, and write down all those sins that you are carrying within your heart and that are making this journey so hard to walk because they weight so much. Share them with her because she understands. Some time during this journey, once you are ready, visit a church and receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Once you go to confession, release your sins and leave them there. Do not continue to carry them with you. Your Father has already forgiven you.

Part II-The Bridge

“The older son became angry…” Luke 15:28

This morning I began step #19 and then for reasons beyond my control, I was not able to send it because the internet was down in my house. In those five hours a lot happened. I lived the parable of the prodigal son first from the son’s point of view and then from the father’s (or mother’s point of view). In the reading, there is no mention of a mother, but if we use our imagination, we can believe there was a mother who through the whole ordeal served as the liaison between the father and the sons, as well as between the brothers.

As a mother, sometimes I feel my entire purpose in this life is to be a bridge. A bridge between my husband and my children. A bridge between my children. I am always trying to keep the peace in our family.

This morning, somewhere between writing the meditation and going to the office to re-write it and send it, my daughter summoned me to the backyard. “Mom, I’ll be in the backyard. When you finish, please meet me there, I need to talk to you.” I will spare you with the details, I’ll just give you a hint. The topic of conversation was “curfews.” If you have teenagers or young adults, I am sure you can all relate.

My husband is very, very strict. He’s the best husband and father to my children I could have ever asked for. This year we’ll celebrate our 25th anniversary and the road has been bumpy and narrow, but if I had to do it all over again I would not change a thing. Sometimes, though, I must admit that he’s so strict with the kids that I feel he’s just not fair. However, I must act as the “bridge” to support him and at the same time try to find a compromise with the kids.

This morning was one of those times and I felt I was living the parable of the prodigal son. Having two boys and a girl, there’s always the usual “it’s not fair…” Sibling rivalry is very normal, the important thing is to love them equally, to show them that each one is important and is given the same amount of attention… even if they feel that is not the case.

It is the same with our Father in heaven. He loves all of us the same, unconditionally, and even if sometimes we feel that “it’s not fair…” each of us is just as important to Him as our brothers and sisters. Are we willing to be embraced by our Father, even if we just saw Him embracing that brother or sister we dislike so much?

Eventually the issue of the “curfews” was resolved in our home. I served as the bridge between father and daughter. They had a serious conversation and reached an agreement that was satisfying to both… and peace was restored once again.

Our Father is waiting with open arms. He also wants us to make peace with our brothers and sisters. Are we going to continue acting like children, “but it’s not fair…,” or are we going to grow up, leave our differences aside and become a real family in His kingdom?

Step #18-Becoming the Cornerstone

“The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone.” Matthew 21:42

Friday of the Second Week of Lent (March 13, 2009)

Jesus was rejected by his own people and then He went on to become the cornerstone of all humanity.

Do you ever feel like you are not good enough or important enough to do something for the Kingdom of God? Are you afraid that if you try you may be rejected? Maybe you volunteered and nobody has called you. Jesus doesn’t want us to sit by the phone waiting for it to ring. He wants us to pick it up and call our parish, call the person leading the next Emmaus retreat or call a nursing home and ask if they could use our help. If they say no, don’t give up, call somebody else.

There is a lot to be done and Jesus needs all our help. We are His body here on earth and He needs every part: the hands, the legs, the mouth, the ears, the eyes…

Are you ready to become a cornerstone? We do not need to be smart or rich or very talented to help Jesus improve His kingdom. We just need to be humble and to have the desire to work in whatever area He needs us.

Pray to Jesus and ask Him to lead you where He needs your help. This journey will take you there. Are you ready to accept the challenge?

Step #17-Be Compassionate

“Blessed are they who have kept the word with a generous heart and yield a harvest through perseverance.”

Thursday of the Second Week of Lent (March 12, 2009)

Today’s gospel reading talks about a rich man and a poor man named Lazarus. The rich man goes to hell and Lazarus goes to heaven. Of course, this is one of the many parables that Jesus used to teach. It did not happen for real, but it could very well happen to us if we lose sight of Jesus.

Why did the rich man go to hell? Certainly it was not because he was rich. The reason why he went to hell was because he lacked compassion. Poor Lazarus was constantly begging at his door and he ignored him, as if he did not exist.

Jesus does not care how much money we have in our bank accounts, what job we have, our level of education or the size of the house we live in. He does care, however, about how we use our treasures and talents. If we become like the rich man, that all we care about is ourselves and we feel no compassion for the Lazaruses in our lives, we risk ending up like the rich man, who received his reward on earth and his punishment in hell.

Jesus wants us to “yield a harvest” of love and kindness here on earth. He wants us to feel compassion for the people that we come in contact each and every day. It’s very easy to become so comfortable with our surroundings that we don’t even notice how the person sitting next to us is feeling today.

As we walk on this journey, Jesus wants us to go slow and notice everything and everyone around us. He also wants us to stop and pick up certain virtues or values as we find them along the path. One of these virtues is compassion.

Today, let’s try to pay attention to someone that most of the time goes unnoticed, perhaps a coworker that we rarely talk to and could use a smile today or a family member that could use our help with their chores. As we show compassion for the Lazaruses in our lives, we will experience God’s generous heart.