Hope for the Crabs

 “Our hope for you is firm, for we know that as you share in the sufferings, you also share in the encouragement.” 1 Corinthians 1:7

I always compare myself to a crab. The reason is that when life throws me a curveball, I tend to run and hide, just like the crabs do in the sand. When I’m facing a difficult situation, it’s hard for me to open up. My first instinct is to hide in my private crab hole, and keep my feelings bottled up inside. Coincidentally, even though I don’t pay much attention to the horoscope, my sign is cancer, and it does describe me perfectly.

It’s not good to bottle up our feelings when we are feeling sad, stressed or depressed. A burden shared is much easier to carry. As the saying goes: “A burden shared is a burden halved, just like a joy shared is a joy doubled.” I learned this lesson back in 2009 when I was facing my darkest hour. I was asked not to talk about it for various reasons, so I turned into a crab. I separated from my friends. I stopped participating in the Emmaus retreats, of which I had been an active member up to that point. I was carrying this heavy burden on my own. Well, not exactly. My husband was carrying it with me. And God was helping us. But still, I needed community badly.

God, however, works in mysterious ways, and He led me to a bible community at St. Louis Catholic Church. It took weeks, even months, but little by little, I began to venture out of the crab hole. When I finally opened up and shared my burden, my new brothers and sisters in Christ asked if they could help me carry my burden. And just like that, my burden halved. And eventually, my burden turned into joy. And just like they had halved my burden, they doubled my joy.

The book of the Bible that we studied that year was Genesis, and now, thirteen years later, we are studying Genesis once again. But the beauty of the Bible is that we can read it a thousand times, and always get something different out of it. As I look back, I realize that I have come a long way from my crabby ways. Now, whether through my blog or in person, I don’t carry my burdens alone. I share them with others. And it is so much easier when we allow our community to help us.

If you have crabby tendencies like me, do not despair. There is hope for the crabs. Just like I learned to step out of the crab hole, you can too. Sometimes we think that the burden we carry is different than everyone else’s, but you’ll be surprised. When I shared my burden all those years ago, I discovered that there were many people carrying a similar burden. When I allowed them to help me, the weight of the burden diminished exponentially. And eventually, I began to help others, and I realized that we are not meant to be crabs.

The lesson I learned and which I hope I can share is: “Don’t be a crab.” Step out of the crab hole, and allow others to help you carry whatever it is that you are going through. There’s a saying in Spanish that goes like this: “Cada uno con lo suyo y Dios con lo de todos.” (Each one with its own and God with everyone’s). But God doesn’t want us to isolate ourselves. We are meant to live in community, helping each other out. So don’t be afraid to open up. You’ll be surprised how many others are carrying a similar burden, and they can help to alleviate yours. 

If I learned to step out of the crab hole, you can too. There is hope for the crabs. A burden shared is a burden halved, just like a joy shared is a joy doubled. Don’t limit yourself to share the joys. I want to hear about your burdens too, and I will do my best to half your weight.

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