Letters to Heaven: Help me Grow Closer to You

"You are the beloved child of God. He will be there when you make your long jump. Don't try to grab Him; He will grab you. Just stretch out your arms and hands and trust, trust, trust." Henry Nouwen

August 31, 2011

Dear Jesus:

The month of August is over. It was such a wonderful month that I wish it had lasted a bit longer. We had a good return flight from Seattle and we are now back into our normal routines. The only one that is still resting and on vacation is Rafi.

Today I went to the Emmaus meeting at Belen. The topic was: "What can I do to get closer to God?" I didn't talk at the meeting but the word that kept coming to my mind while everyone else was talking was "surrender." In order to get closer to You, Jesus, I have to surrender my agenda, my plans, my time, my to-do list and my desires. I have to align my mind with yours. I need to spend more time alone with You in the Blessed Sacrament or in whatever sacred space I can find in order to listen to your voice and determine what it is that You want from me. It may not be what I want but if it's what You want then I will get closer to You. Help me grow closer to You, Jesus.

Alicia said in the meeting that "it's in our darkest moments when our faith grows." What an incredibly true statement. Don't I know it. My faith grew tremendously in the past couple of years as I traversed through my darkest hour.

Please help me to savor my time with You. Help me to align my mind and my desires with yours. It's not what I want, Jesus, it's what You want. Let your word become alive within me. As Blanca said, "let me be a witness of You by my actions not my words."

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 31, 2017

Dear Jesus:

When I was little, I used to love to go to the circus. I loved all the animal shows and the clowns, but the trapeze flyers terrified me. Most of the shows had nets below, but I still wanted to close my eyes when they were flying through the air. In retrospect, I realize that in order to jump, the trapeze flyer had to have a lot of trust in the catcher. He had to trust that the catcher would catch him. It's the same with You. You always catch me when I'm falling. But in order for You to be able to catch me, I have to trust You. I have to surrender. And when I do, that's when I grow closer to You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: I AM not INVISIBLE

"You are rewarded not according to your work or your time but according to the measure of your love." — St. Catherine of Siena

August 28, 2007

Dear Jesus:

A week has passed since I last had this "living-room" intimacy with You. This weekend, all the hula hoops I was trying to balance came tumbling down. Yes, I can blame it on being sick and not having the energy to even move, but the fact is that I feel completely stressed-out, overwhelmed and unappreciated.

I have the pressure of Rafi's departure to college on my shoulders. In top of the rollercoaster of emotions that I'm feeling because I'm going to miss him tremendously, I feel I'm responsible for the full-extent of the preparations: flight-hotel-car reservations for our trip to drop him off, buying and packing all the items he needs for the camping trip that Princeton offers to the incoming freshmen, getting all the supplies for his dorm, opening a bank account for him, teaching him how to handle the finances, etc. In addition, he planned a good-bye "getty" with friends (encouraged by me), but that means that now I need to make sure that the house is spotless, the lawn is cut, that there are enough drinks and food, etc.

I must also not forget that I have two other kids. Chabeli already threw in my face, that this year I forgot to take their traditional first day of school pictures. It's true. I completely forgot. How could I? This is her senior year. I'm supposed to be giving her my undivided attention. I have tried to take the picture all week long, but there doesn't seem to be a good day. I think she's doing it on purpose: "my hair is not pretty today," "I'm too tired." It's her way of punishing me for forgetting. I haven't even picked up her senior pictures which have been ready for three weeks now. I have to help her put together her senior page for the yearbook and her fashion show ad, and to top it off, I missed the second meeting for the fashion show because I forgot, and tomorrow, I will have to miss the third one because of Rafi's "getty." Of course, I didn't have to be in the fashion show committee, but I'm a super-mom so I just have to be involved in everything. Jesus, I'm drowning. Please throw me a lifeline.

Then there's Alex. I feel like I have pushed him on the sidelines, and he's completely on his own. I know there are still a few items on his supply list missing, and I just don't have the energy to go "supply" shopping. Tonight is "back-to-school" night at Belen, and I will be there dragging my feet, because if I don't go, who will? Right now, Rafe has more than enough on his plate with work. He's completely stressed out. Yesterday, he was telling me that he felt like he was coming down with a cold. I can't allow that. It's bad enough I got sick. Both of us would be a complete disaster.

I'm looking around me and the house is upside down. The breakfast dishes have not been picked up. The beds have not been made. There are stacks of paper everywhere with unpaid bills and unopened mail. I still have to meet with the contractor. Yes, as if I didn't have enough on my plate, we are about to embark on a project of dust and disaster that will last a few months. We are redoing both bathrooms and all the closets.

I know that I am not alone. All moms feel exactly the same way. That's usually the topic of conversation when we have a minute to get together. It's not that I don't enjoy the things that I do for my kids and for my husband. I enjoy it and I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. It's just that sometimes, like today, I feel like I'm invisible. I feel like nothing of what I do matters. What I do, goes completely unnoticed. It's what I don't do, what I forget to do, or the tasks that I couldn't finish that everyone notices: "Mom, you forgot to take my picture on the first day of school." "Mom, you said you were going to take me "supply" shopping today." "Mom, what can I eat? Is there food? There's nothing to eat in this house..." I am invisible. Everything I do goes unnoticed. But I better not forget anything.

Jesus, forgive me. I should be grateful for the lack of time because that means that my days are not spent in idleness. I should be giving You thanks for my husband and my children instead of complaining to You. I am grateful. I thank You for my family. I thank You for every busy minute of my day. It's just that sometimes it would be nice to know that I am noticed, that what I do matters to someone. Sometimes, it would be nice to hear "thank you for..." instead of "when are you...," "remember to...," "don't forget..."

I am invisible, but I know that someday they will notice. In the meantime, I just have to keep loving them the way only a mom can love.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 28, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I'm stressed out just from reading my letter to You from ten years ago. What was I thinking? If I had to do it all over again, I would definitely not try to be a super-mom. Here are fifteen lessons I learned from my failed attempt at being a super-mom:

1. If all the hula hoops fall to the ground, it's fine. I can pick them up again. And it's not necessary to balance a dozen hula hoops at a time.
2. I didn't need to be a super-mom all of the time. If I had delegated some of the responsibilities I took upon my shoulders to the kids, I would have not been as stressed out and they would have learned faster to manage their lives.
3. The youngest child is not the least cared child. It's actually to their advantage that we have less time to be so involved. Alex became independent and self-sufficient much faster than his brother and sister. And he never held it against me. 
4. When they had "gettys," the house did not need to be perfect. The last thing their friends noticed was whether the lawn was cut or the floors were shining. All they cared about was being together and having a good time. And if the food ran out, pizza delivery was just a phone call away. 
5. It's fine for the house to be upside down once in a while. My kids remember the times we spent together and all the times they had friends over. They do not remember whether the dishes were in the sink or the beds were unmade. 
6. It's not necessary to do everything equally for each child. It was impossible when I had multiple children to give each one my undivided attention all the time. As long as I love each of them equally, that's all that matters. First day of school pictures are irrelevant in the overall scheme of things. 
7. It's more important to spend quality time with them, than to spend time in their school with other parents while they are home alone. I didn't need to be a delegate parent for every child in every grade. They couldn't care less whether I was part of the fashion show committee or the graduation committee. As a matter of fact, the older they got, the less they wanted me to be involved. Alex forbid me from becoming a delegate parent for his grade. And I am so thankful. 
8. I didn't need to be super organized all of the time. If they didn't have all their supplies on the first day of school, it was not the end of the world. They survived. And if I couldn't get through everything in my extensive to-do list, that was fine too. We got through the important stuff. 
9. Sleep is necessary, even for moms. I didn't need to be awake while everyone else was sleeping trying to finish what I couldn't accomplish during the day. And all those worry hours I spent awake were best spent with a rosary in my hands. 
10. "Mommy time" is extremely important, and should be high on the priority list. The better I take care of myself, the better I can take care of them. After all, they still need me in their lives and will need me for many years to come. 
11. Paying attention to my hubby was equally important. It still is. After all, we are the roots of the family tree, and now that the kids are grown up, we are by ourselves most of the time. Even though we always nourished our relationship, there were many dates and trips we missed because our children always came first. Leaving them with the grandparents once in a while was perfectly acceptable. 
12. Kisses and hugs are always necessary, even when they grow up. Especially when they grow up!!! And there can never be too much, so I need to continue kissing them and hugging them. 
13. Carrying all that guilt around for the things I could not do was a waste of time. I have learned to forgive myself for not being perfect. I wish I had learned that lesson much earlier. 
14. I am not invisible. My children did appreciate what I did for them, even if they didn't express it in words all of the time. I am seeing the results now, one decade later. Even though many times I failed at being a super-mom, I tried my best. 
15. And the biggest lesson I learned was that the most important thing was not that I got rewarded for my work, the most important thing is that I did it because I love them, and I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. 

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Nothing is Impossible with God

"Avoid worrying, then, about anything else for your children except whatever may contribute to bringing them up virtuously. For the rest, having entrusted them to God, try to see what His will for them is, to help them along the path in life He has chosen for them. Never be afraid of relying too much on Him, but rather seek always to increase your trust more and more, for this is the most pleasing homage you can pay Him and it will be the measure of the graces you will receive." St. Claude De La Columbiere

August 27, 2015

Dear St. Monica:

Today is your feast day. I have been praying your novena for the past nine days. And as You know, I have been asking you to intercede for Alex.

A few weeks ago, Alex called us at midnight. He had been throwing up all day long. He was all alone in Connecticut and it was too late for him to go to the store to buy something for his upset stomach. He didn't have Gatorade or saltines in the house. I told him to get ice chips and eat them little by little. I was so scared that he would dehydrate. He was alone, in the middle of nowhere, without a car and no one nearby that he could call. I know that his guardian angel was by his side and that Mama Mary held his hand that night. He was not alone but I still wanted to be there with him. Rafael and I stayed on the phone with him for about an hour. We prayed a rosary and around 1 am we hung up with the promise that he would call us if he didn't fall asleep. He didn't call us but we remained awake most of the night.

My nerves have been on edge all month long. Alex has been home for two weeks. I took him to a gastroenterologist to rule out that the stomach issues that he's been having on and off all summer are not simply related to his nerves. The doctor ran some labs and the results showed that the enzymes in his liver were over 200 when the normal should be under 40. I have spent this past week running around with him. We went to Baptist for an ultrasound of the liver, an upper GI X-Ray and more labs.

In the meantime, you, St. Monica, took my prayers and petitions to our Lord. He heard our pleas and He answered our prayers. Today we got all the results and all tests came back negative. The doctor was checking for hepatitis, mono, and a few other things. The ultrasound also showed a clean liver. The new labs also showed that the enzyme levels have dropped. They are still high, but just over 100. We may never know what caused them to spike in the first place. Maybe it was a virus, or something he ate or all the college drinking. Whatever it was, I am so relieved that it's nothing serious. 

St. Monica, please take my prayer of thanksgiving to the Lord for healing Alex's liver. And ask Him to please be patient with my three kids, especially Alex. Please ask Him to move their hearts so they feel a longing for God. Please intercede for them so they return to God's path. I know that nothing is impossible with God.

I told Alex today not to keep God inside a drawer, only to be taken out when things get tough. He never answered me. I can only pray that my message remains in his heart.

St. Monica, please pray for us and pray for our children!!!

August 27, 2017

Dear St. Monica:

This year, I have also been praying your novena. I am praying for your intercession, not just for my kids but also for all of my friends' kids. Please intercede for all teenagers and young adults, that they may remain in the path that leads them to God.

St. Monica, you are a great example to me. You never gave up on your son, St. Augustine. You always prayed for him. You had faith and hope that he would walk one day in the path that led to God. You persevered in prayer for more than 15 years. Even when the clergy assured you that it was useless after so many years, you didn't give up. And since nothing is impossible with God, your prayers were answered and your son converted.

I want to have the same faith and hope that you had. I'm still praying for my children to feel a longing for God. May they follow the path that God has chosen for them. Please, St. Monica, continue to intercede for them.

St. Monica, please pray for us and pray for our children!!!

Letters to Heaven: I Will Cherish the Memories

"Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!" 2 Corinthians 9:15

August 26, 2008

Dear Jesus:

It's been more than a month since I've taken the time to share some written thoughts with You. I really need to do this more often. I have to get back in the habit of writing once a week like I used to. I feel You calling me to write more, yet I'm struggling and writing less.

Summer is officially over. Well, not officially. We still have another month of summer but once classes begin, it just feels like it's over. Alex returned to school last week. Chabeli began her orientation at UM five days ago. She starts classes tomorrow. And Rafi leaves in three days.

It's been a wonderful summer. My only regret is that it went by so fast... probably because we were all busy. We took two one-week vacations. The first one to Siesta Key was nice and relaxed. The five of us went and we had "togetherness" time. The kids also got to spend time with their friends. Fifteen teenagers coincided in Siesta Key at the same time.

The second vacation was a cruise to the Western Caribbean. This one was bittersweet since Rafi stayed behind by his own choice. I think it was good for him, though. It gave him a sense of responsibility. He stayed in charge of the house and the dog. He did an excellent job, especially making sure that all the empty beer bottles were well hidden at the bottom of the recycling bin. In turn, Rafe and I got to spend quality time with Chabeli and Alex. We also reconnected with Chabeli's godparents and their two kids who went with us. We have been friends forever but don't see each other enough since they live in Miami Lakes.

The rest of the summer was spent working... Four of us worked since Rafi and Chabeli both got summer jobs. Alex took classes for one month. The rest of the time he slept, watched TV and played video games. Que buena vida. I must make sure that he finds a job next summer.

This summer, I feel that we are more united as a family. The kids are growing and maturing right in front of our eyes, and it's such a good feeling seeing that they have turned out fine.

Thank You, Jesus, for my family. Thank You for giving me these wonderful three months to spend with them. I will cherish the memories in my heart forever.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 18, 2012

Dear Jesus:

I'm writing this letter to You from Siesta Key. We had a small window of opportunity between Rafi's return from San Francisco and Alex's start of the school year to squeeze five days for the five of us to get away. And we all voted on Siesta Key, our perfect small piece of heaven here on earth. Here we can truly find quality time without interruptions.

We have been spending our days at the beach and our evenings either cooking or eating out. We tried to catch the sunset every night. A couple of times we went to St. Armand's to walk and eat ice cream at Kilwin's. Last night, we had dinner at a new restaurant that we had never tried before, Ophelia's on the Bay. It was delicious and the setting was perfect. It was right on the water. While we were there, we witnessed an incredible rain storm. This is definitely one restaurant to be repeated on future visits.

It was nice to end that summer in this fashion, sharing with one another, playing games and simply enjoying each other's company. It was the perfect gift before Rafi moves to California to start his new life as an official adult. I will forever cherish these memories in my heart.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 26, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I will definitely cherish the memories of our Siesta Key vacations in my heart forever. Those were everyone's favorite vacations. Endless days of sun, beach and relaxation, followed by our evening strolls through St. Armand's Circle eating ice cream from Kilwin's. We have not returned since 2013. Now we spend our beach time in our Hallandale Beach bungalow. But Siesta Key will always hold a special place in my heart. We will return one day.

I had the gift of uniting my three kids in the same zip code two nights ago. This now happens so rarely that when it does, I truly treasure it. As my friend Lupe was telling me: "These moments are more precious than a diamond." I agree with her. Don't give me diamonds or gold, just give me memories to cherish.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Thank You for the Angels

"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken."—Psalm 62:5–6

August 23, 2009

Dear Jesus:

Thank You for all the angels that You have sent us to help us deal with Rafi's illness. First of all, I want to thank You for leading me to the Bible class at St. Louis. They were total strangers when I walked in, but through the weeks, they turned into an amazing support group. They have been wonderful. They have been praying for Rafi and they seem to truly care. One of the ladies even introduced us to a parish family who have a daughter with the same illness. They provided us with very valuable information.

Thank You for my friend Elyna. Even though I had distanced myself from her through the years, she has turned out to be a great source of strength and support. She understands because she suffers from the same illness. She has given Rafi some very good tips which hopefully will help him in dealing with his illness.

My mom and my sisters-in-law have also been wonderful through this whole ordeal. They have been praying and supporting us every step of the way. My mom is constantly giving me "estampitas" or sending me prayers. One of my favorite is an "estampita" she gave me of You as a child, specifically from the "Infant Jesus of Prague Shrine." I'm saying the prayer every day:

"Jesus, you decided to become a child,

and I'm coming to You full of trust.

I believe that your attentive love 

forestalls all my needs.

Even for the intercession of your Holy Mother,

You can meet my necessities, 

spiritual as well as material, 

if I pray according to your holy will. 

I love You with all my heart, all my strength.

I beg your pardon if my weakness makes me sin.

I repeat with the Gospel

'Lord, if You want You can heal my son.'

I leave You to decide how and when.

I'm ready to accept suffering, if this is your will, 

but help me not to become hardened to it, 

rather to bear fruit.

Help me to be a faithful servant

and for your sake, holy Child, 

to love my neighbor as myself.

Almighty Child, unceasingly I pray You

to support me in my necessities

of the present moment.

Grant me the grace to remain in You,

to be possessed and to possess You entirely,

with your parents, Mary and Joseph,

in the eternal praise

of your heavenly servants.

Amen."

My biggest strength has come from You, Jesus. We would not have been able to survive the past four months without You in our lives. You have pulled us, pushed us, carried us, dried our tears, listened to us and You have cried with us. You have led us to the right support groups, placed amazing angels in our path, and made us discover things that we would not have found otherwise.

My trust is on You, Jesus. You are the friend that will always be available for us. You won't let us down. You always have time for us. You are never too busy to lend us your ear. You are all the support we need to navigate our way back to health.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 23, 2017

Dear Jesus:

As You know, I have the personality of a crab. I have gotten better at sharing, but in the past, whenever I used to go through something difficult, instead of opening up and sharing it with my friends, I used to hide like a crab in a hole inside the sand. That is what happened during Rafi's illness. Little by little, I began to isolate myself. I kept it hidden deep within my heart. I told some people, obviously, but for the most part, I didn't want to burden anyone with our pain.

But You kept sending us angels. Thank You because You knew exactly what we needed and whom we needed. You placed the right persons in our path, and You led us where we needed to go.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Sharing "Living-Room" Intimacy with You

"Bring me the sacrifice of your time, a most precious commodity. In this action-addicted world, few of My children take time to sit quietly in My Presence. But for those who do, blessings flow like streams of living water." Sarah Young In Jesus Calling-Aug 2nd Meditation

August 20, 2007

Dear Jesus:

I have separated this quiet time to be with You. Eventually, I would like to get in the habit of spending one hour of quiet time with You, but for now, I will start with half an hour.

I have been reading the book "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World" and it has made me realize how much of a Martha I am but how my heart yearns to be a Mary. For this half hour each morning, I pledge to be a Mary. Sometimes, it will be in my office in front of the computer while I read a meditation. Other times, it will be where I am now, in the living room, sharing "living-room" intimacy with You.

I tend to be like Martha because I have so many responsibilities and I have a hard time saying "no" so I get involved in everything. I feel like I have a bunch of hula hoops around my waist and I'm trying to balance them all at the same time. If any of them fall to the ground, I will have failed. I have been trying to keep in motion too many hula hoops: wife, mother, accountant, daughter, Emmaus sister, chauffeur, delegate parent... It's very tiring.

The only way that I can find the rhythm to keep all those hoops in motion at the same time is with You at the center, Jesus. You can help me find the rhythm. Jesus, You can be my center.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 20, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Here I am spending some quiet time with You. I'm not in my living room, though. I'm sitting in the balcony of my beach bungalow. It's raining. I love rainy days, especially if I don't have to go outside. On this morning, I already went out once to take Penny for a walk. The beach was deserted. There was beauty and peace all around me.

Even though I do not have a specific time set aside for You, I do try to make the time to spend a few quiet minutes with You. Sometimes is in the mornings. Sometimes is at night. And sometimes is in the middle of the day. Sometimes is in my living room. Sometimes is in the Blessed Sacrament. Sometimes is at the beach. And sometimes, like today, is in the balcony. This quiet time with You is precious and sacred. Sometimes I pray. Sometimes I write to You. And sometimes I retreat into the "Sacred Garden" of my soul and I listen to your voice.

Thank You for being my center, Jesus!!! I love sitting at your feet while You pour your love on me.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: A Sheaf of Trust

"When you enter the land that I am giving you and you reap its harvest, you shall bring the sheaf of the first fruits of your harvest to the priest." Lev 23:10

August 18, 2010

Dear Jesus:

I have all three chicks here with me in Siesta Key. I'm a happy hen. Recently, Dr. Strassberg told me: "You are only as happy as your least happiest child." What a profound truth. I guess that is why I feel so happy and content this summer. It must be because all my children are happy and content. Thank You, Jesus.

All three have been working all summer. I'm glad that we were able to squeeze in these five days in Siesta Key before classes resume. Rafe and I are planning to go to England in October. Chabeli will be doing a semester abroad over there so we are going to visit her and also take the opportunity to visit a few places that we have never been to. It's going to be strange to travel by ourselves. It will be a prelude into our future, sort of like a second honeymoon. Since the kids were born, we have not gone anywhere by ourselves for such a long time. I am looking forward to it.

I pray to You that everything goes well while we are gone. I'm a little nervous that we are going to be so far away from Rafi and Alex, but Rafi has been doing fine health wise. I trust that You will continue to take good care of him like You have been doing since he returned to Princeton. Alex will be staying with my parents. And I also pray to You that everything goes smoothly for Chabeli during the three months that she will spend on the other side of the world. Please, Jesus, protect them all. I entrust them to You with a sheaf of trust.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 27, 2010

Dear Jesus:

This month just flew. Our five days in Siesta Key were simply wonderful. That is definitely "our place." It's where we can truly "get away" and disconnect from everything. When we are there, we can really spend quality time with the kids. We had five amazing days of peace and tranquility. Thank You for giving us such good weather and for the beautiful double rainbow. The sea was great, the apartment was awesome, and all the restaurants we visited had great food. And of course, our favorite ice cream from Kilwins was part of the menu. We played monopoly or rummy cube almost every night. We just had an awe-inspiring time. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end so last Sunday we had to come back. Thank You for keeping us safe in this short trip.

Alex is already back at school. He likes all his teachers thus far and he has plenty of friends in all his classes. Right now, he's still at school and it's 7 pm. He stayed for a football game. He's enjoying his high school years in full force.

Chabeli is getting ready for her three-month trip. We took a day off from Siesta Key, and the two of us drove to an outlet mall in Tampa. We did some serious shopping. This weekend, we are going to start packing. She also got her room assignment. Thank You, Jesus, for placing your hand in this and making things happen in her favor. She is rooming with Alex, Nick's twin sister, and Nick and Mickey are right next door. They got a house which they will share with four others. It's all coming together fast. Please, Jesus, keep her safe.

Rafi is doing great. He is more focused than we have ever seen him. For the first time, we feel that he has solid goals. He is truly happy with his decision to study "Computer Science." Even though he didn't enjoy every part of his internship, he did enjoy the programming portions of it. He would really like to find an internship next summer at "Pixar." If it will be in his best interest, Jesus lead him in that direction. If it's not, then move him towards a different path. I trust You completely. After all, You have been in total control since the beginning. Even during his illness, I have seen your hand every step of the way.

Thank You, Jesus for a happy and peaceful summer.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 18, 2017

Thank You, Jesus, for always leading my kids in the right direction. When I read my letters to You, and I see how much time I wasted worrying, I realize that I need to worry less and trust You more. When I start thinking about Alex, and worrying whether he will find a good job upon graduation, all I need to do is look at how good things turned out for his siblings because I allowed You to take charge. Therefore, I leave him fully in your hands. You know which company and which city will be the best fit for him.

The other day in mass, the first reading was from Leviticus, and it talked about trust. The priest said that the sheaf of the first fruits of the harvest was quite valuable. Therefore, in order to give it away required a lot of trust.

I want to show You, Jesus, how much I trust You, by giving You the sheaf of my harvest. My children are my most valuable harvest. I am handing them to You and placing my full trust that You will lead them down the path that You have already prepared for them. I turn them over to You with a sheaf of trust.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: What a Contrast

"God expects something from you. God wants something from you. God hopes in you. God comes to break down all our fences. He comes to open the doors of our lives, our dreams, our ways of seeing things. God comes to break open everything that keeps you closed in. He is encouraging you to dream. He wants to make you see that, with you, the world can be different. For the fact is, unless you offer the best of yourselves, the world will never be different." Pope Francis World Youth Day Prayer Vigil in Kraków July 30, 2016

August 16, 2011

Dear Jesus:

We left Seattle and headed to Port Angeles. On our way there we stopped at a town named Poulsbo with an interesting story. The Norwegians arrived to this town in the late 1800s and named it Paulsbo, which means Paul's Place. But the post office made a mistake in the spelling when they recorded the name, and thus, the name Poulsbo remained. It was a very picturesque town with a Norwegian character.

Today, I would like to say a special prayer for World Youth Week which is taking place in Madrid, Spain. I would like to pray for conversions for the youth of the world. I would like to pray for all the youth that are attending so their hearts will be moved and that those that You are calling to a religious vocation will have the courage to say YES. I also want to pray for the youth of Spain that they are touched by what is taking place in their country and that their hearts be opened to follow You. Last but not least, I would like to pray for our Pope so that he may lead our youth to You. I pray specially for the St. Louis and Our Lady of Lourdes Youth groups that are participating. Protect them all while there and may they have a life changing experience.

St. Paul, intercede for our youth.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 19, 2011

Dear Jesus:

We are back in Seattle. After breakfast, we walked and walked and walked some more. We walked past the harbor, the piers and the cruise ships. We noticed a lot of teenagers with bookbags walking in the opposite direction so we decided to follow them to see where they were headed. We got to an area where there were hundreds and hundreds of teenagers and young adults waiting in line to enter. It seemed like a concert area. Rafi checked it out in Google and he told us that the event was called Hempfest. He told us that it was a yearly event in Seattle where people gather to smoke marijuana. I was appalled. I'm talking not just hundreds but thousands of kids just walking to this place. Chabeli looked it up online and she said that in 2008 the attendance was 300,000. What is this world coming to? What sort of empty lives do these young people lead that they find such fulfillment in drugs? 

In Spain, hundreds of thousands of youth are gathered right now to pray and worship God on World Youth Day. In Seattle hundreds of thousands are gathered to smoke weed. What a contrast.

St. Peter, intercede for our youth.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 16, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I looked up Hempfest online, and sure enough, it still takes place. As a matter of fact, this year's event starts in two days. It's a three day event and they are expecting more than 450,000 attendees this year, mostly teenagers and young adults. It's the world's largest event advocating for the decriminalization of marijuana.

The good news is that in 2011, over one million people attended World Youth Day in Madrid. And by 2016, the number had tripled. As many as three million people attended World Youth Day in Poland last year. Pope Francis encouraged the throngs of young people gathered in Kraków to "believe in a new humanity." He told them to have "the courage to be more powerful than evil."

There is hope. Even though a small percentage of our youth will allow drugs and the enemy to control their lives, the majority of the youth will be stronger than evil and will refuse to succumb to the pressure of the world that tries to sell them a lie by telling them that drugs cannot destroy them.

"People may judge you to be dreamers, because you believe in a new humanity, one that rejects hatred between peoples, one that refuses to see borders as barriers and can cherish its own traditions without being self-centered or small-minded," Pope Francis told his flock, many of them in their late teens, 20s or 30s.

I also believe in our youth because I see how they embrace all people. They look beyond the color of the skin, beyond nationalities and beyond cultural differences. They are breaking all the barriers that many in our generation have erected. As Pope Francis told the youth, "Today, we adults need you to teach us how to live in diversity, in dialogue, to experience multiculturalism not as a threat but an opportunity. Have the courage to teach us that it is easier to build bridges than walls!"

I am learning from my children who look at the heart not at the outer shell. They are teaching me to build bridges and not to judge others simply because they are different than I am. There is definitely hope.

Mama Mary, intercede for our youth.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: The Assumption into Our Hearts

“Today the liturgy invites us to contemplate Mary, taken up body and soul into heaven. By a special privilege, she was enriched by divine grace from the moment of her conception, and Christ, who ascended to the right hand of the Father, opened the doors of his kingdom to her, first among human creatures. Now from heaven, where the Queen of the angels and saints is crowned, the Mother of God and of the Church is close to the Christian people before whom she shines as the “new and immaculate woman (who) mediated for the guilt of the first woman.”  – Pope St. John Paul II 

August 15, 2012

Dear Mama Mary:

Today is your feast day, "The Assumption." I am sorry that I did not go to mass today to celebrate with You. I am enjoying a short vacation with my family in Siesta Key.

I liked Father Vallee's homily for today's mass. I receive his homilies by email. He said that on this day what we celebrate is not so much your assumption into heaven but your assumption into our hearts because the Kingdom of God is found within our hearts. That is so beautiful and so true. You and Your Son don't live in a remote, far away place, You live within our hearts.

Thank You for interceding so that Rafi, Emily and Chris could find the perfect apartment in San Francisco. You truly never cease to amaze me. Rafi sent me a text message last Friday telling me that they where nowhere near finding an apartment. The first one they liked was over a bar so that was a deal breaker. The second one was so popular that over 20 groups of people were interested. They submitted their application but they did not know if they would get it. I told him that I would pray harder for the right apartment to become available. I grabbed my rosary and as I drove, I prayed to You for your intercession. I was concerned because they only had two more days to check out apartments before they returned home. I shared all my worries with You, You took them to your Son, and He answered my prayer before I finished the rosary. As I was praying the last mystery, Rafi texted me to say that they had just received the announcement that they were the chosen group for the popular apartment. Thank You Mama Mary because the apartment is perfect. It's in a very nice residential neighborhood. One of the rules of the building is that they don't allow big parties or lots of noise, so it's a quiet and peaceful building. The apartment is spacious and very pretty from what I have seen in pictures. It has three bedrooms, three baths, wood floors, lots of windows and a very nice view from its fourth floor location. And the apartment was well under their budget. I am super happy for them. Even though Rafi will be far away, I have no doubt that You, Your Son and all the Angels will protect him as he starts this new chapter in his life.

Mama Mary, thank You for living in my heart and for always looking out for my kids.

I love You, Mama Mary!!!

August 15, 2017

Dear Mama Mary:

Happy Feast Day of the Assumption. Today, I will try very hard to squeeze mass in my day. No excuses.

The two and a half years that Rafi, Emily and Chris lived as roommates in that San Francisco apartment were amazing. It was truly the perfect apartment for them. I used to say that they were like the TV program "Three's Company." They all got along well, the building was in a great location and the size of the apartment was just right for the three of them. Thank You for your timely intercession so they were able to obtain it. And Thank You for always being by Rafi's side through every stage of his life.

Thank You, Mama Mary, for continuing to live in my heart. Thank You because You continue to look out for my kids all the time. Thank You for living in their hearts.

I love You, Mama Mary!!!

Letters to Heaven: Dolphins and Rainbows

"When the bow is in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that is on the earth.” Genesis 9:16

August 14, 2009

Dear Jesus:

This letter comes from Siesta Key. Rafi's doctor gave us the green light after his checkup last week. All his labs were fine, so Rafi is stable enough for us to take this trip as a family. 

While Rafi's checkup was perfect, Chabeli's wasn't so. Never a dull moment in our life. Her sugar was on the high side, as well as her cholesterol. Her iron was also low. She's taking an iron supplement and the doctor says that exercise should take care of the rest. Right now, she's running up and down the beach. There is always something going on to keep us on our toes. But we can handle it, as long as You are grabbing our hand. I know You are.

Thank You for the peace I've been feeling this week. The last five days have been absolutely wonderful. Rafi and Chabeli have been enjoying their time here with their friends, while Alex has been tagging along with the big kids. 

Yesterday, was a magical day. The ocean was full of dolphins and on the horizon, I could clearly see all the colors of the rainbow with the clouds as a backdrop. I wish all days could be just as magical. We have been coming to Siesta Key for 19 years. As I was walking by the seashore today, I was watching all the little children playing. It brought me memories of when we used to come with our own kids when they were little. Rafi and Chabeli were 2 and 1 the first year we came. Alex has been coming since he was just 7 months old. We all love it here. It's part of our life. They grew up spending their summers in Siesta Key. No matter where we traveled, we always tried to squeeze a week at Siesta Key.

Rafe is already snoring next to me. Please, Jesus, keep him strong and healthy. We need each other for support and love. Thank You for placing him in my life 29 years ago.

Thank You, Jesus, for happy, relaxing days in Siesta Key.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 14, 2017

Dear Jesus:

That was truly a magical week at Siesta Key. You sent me so many signs, to let me know that You were in charge and that everything was going to be alright. I remember that on the last day, when I looked up at the sky, there was a cloud in the shape of a dolphin, and right above it, I once again saw the colors of the rainbow. Rainbows have always been a sign from You that everything is going to be fine. Every time I'm worried about something, You paint a rainbow in the sky to let me know that You are in control of the situation. Thank You, Jesus, for dolphins and rainbows.

That trip also marked the beginning of Rafi's healing. He had a few minor flares the following weeks, but by mid-September, I had my healthy boy back. Thank You, Jesus, because I know now that You were carrying him in the palm of your hand. Actually, You were carrying all of us.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Not My Will but Your Will

"Prayer is not sending God to get what you want, prayer is getting you ready to accept what God wants." Unknown Author

August 13, 2007

Dear Jesus:

I just returned from spending a very peaceful weekend in Naples with my hubby. No kids, just us. It was a mini-honeymoon.

I didn't spend too much time meditating. I did pray. I prayed in the car on our way to Naples and on our way back. I prayed for the kids so they would be safe since they stayed home by themselves. We went to mass yesterday, to St. Anne Catholic Church. But honestly, the rest of the time I spent it resting my body and my mind.

And yet, I began this letter with a quote which I received recently by email from an Emmaus sister. This quote made me think. I tend to pray to You with "requests." God help me... God protect the kids... God I need... I'm always asking You to give me what I think I need, but that's not what prayer should be. Prayer should be "God, not my will but your will." After all, You know what I need better than I do. I need to pray so I'm ready to accept your plan.

Jesus, prepare me.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 13, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Little did I know when I prayed to You ten years ago to prepare me that I was going to go through the most turbulent decade of my life. My kids' college years have been rough on us. I just sent our last payment to UConn a few days ago, and I cannot begin to tell You what a huge relief that was. And I am not talking just financially, which it will be a huge respite for our pockets. I am talking emotionally. Ever since we began the college years in 2007, I feel like we have been riding a never-ending rollercoaster. And even though I'm supposed to be praying, "Not my will, Lord, but your will," I beg You to please protect Alex in his last semester. Allow us to finish our college years in peace because it's been one storm after another since we began ten years ago.

Thank You for carrying us through the worst part of the storms. And thank You for allowing us to grow and become better persons because of the storms.

May your will be done in our lives, Lord.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: The Key Ingredient

"Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful."—Colossians 4:2

August 11, 2006

Dear Jesus:

Summer is almost over and I'm happy to say it's gone pretty well. It's been a relaxing summer. I have been able to deal with my to-do list one item at a time and I have been able to cross out a lot of items. There were a few instances when I felt very overwhelmed and anxious, but all in all, I've done pretty good. I still have a lot of things on my to-do list but I'm not stressing over them. I will handle one item at a time.

I started a prayer group and even though not a lot of people have come, it gave me a sense of peace and tranquility. I don't think I will continue to host it after the summer because it's a lot of work to get the house ready every week for just one person to show up. I will continue to do my daily reflections and prayers on my own.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 11, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I have come a long way. I used to get so anxious when I had a lot to do. I felt I couldn't handle it all. Even though I still feel anxious when I have to meet deadlines at work, I have learned to compartmentalize my life. I also don't write as many "to-do" lists as I used to. I realized that having so much on my list was part of the reason for my anxiety. Now, I just try to tackle three things per day, and that's all. If I make it through those three things, it's a good day. If I do more, it's a really good day. If I can't finish, there's always tomorrow.

My prayer group that summer of 2006 failed because I was putting more effort into being a Martha and not enough time into being a Mary. I was stressed out because I wanted to make sure the house was perfect for the prayer group and that took hours of preparation. I failed to concentrate on the key ingredient.

Now, I have a prayer group and it takes me 30 minutes tops to prepare. All I offer is coffee, juice and fruits. And like your miracle of the multiplication of the breads, we always have more food than we can eat. Someone always brings something to share. But the key ingredient is the prayer time. We pray the rosary, we read a book and we discuss it. Right now, we are reading "Understanding the Faith" by Father Michael Garcia. He's a young 28 year-old priest at St. Louis. The book is amazing. He has managed to summarize the entire Bible in 104 pages, and he has done a wonderful job of explaining all the key points. It's almost like a "Cliff Notes" version of the Bible. Every week, 12 to 20 ladies show up. And we have all the generations covered, from grandmothers to some sweet teenage girls that are madly in love with You. It's a great mix because we get the young views and the mature perspective. Our discussions are lively and You are always at the center. Thank You, Jesus, for putting this prayer group together because this was definitely your doing. And this time, I'm not leaving out the key ingredient. You are the central focus of our prayer group.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: I love Your Sense of Humor

"To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible." — St. Thomas Aquinas

July 17, 2010

Dear Jesus:

I need to apologize because for two weeks we have not gone to mass. You always have time for us, yet we only have time for You when we need You or when we don't have something better to do. The first Sunday, July 4th, we didn't go because we were at the beach and we had company all day long. Yet that's no excuse. We could have gone on Saturday. The second Sunday we did not go because we put other things ahead of You. The beach was too good to pass in the morning and in the afternoon, Spain was playing soccer for the World Cup. Shame on us. We had Rafi here for two Sundays and instead of taking him to mass with us, which is really the only time he goes to mass, we showed him that going to mass is not a priority.

I'm sorry Jesus. I feel bad that I have not spent enough time with You. I do love You and I need You in my life. I am very blessed that You are always a part of my life. I am grateful for all the blessings that You shower upon me every day.

I also love your sense of humor. The things that You do to catch my attention are simply amazing. Yesterday was a perfect example. I was in a hurry because I needed to get to the office as soon as possible. I guess You wanted me to slow down, so what did You do? You locked me out of my car... very funny. My car is not supposed to lock when the keys are inside, yet it did. But You also provided the help. The firemen were conveniently nearby. And in the midst of it all, You opened up the skies and sent me a heavy downpour so that I realized what is truly important. I had just done my hair at the beauty salon. Definitely, my hair is not that important. Once I realized that, You showed me how merciful You truly are. Somehow, You managed to soak me completely from neck to toes, yet my hair remained completely dry. Wow. You never cease to amaze me. You truly are an awesome God.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 9, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Last week, I was on my way home from Home Depot. I was in a hurry because I had a lot to do at home and just a few hours to do it all. As I drove by St. Louis, I felt like You were asking me to go to the Blessed Sacrament. I fought You because I had already had my prayer group in the morning, but I have learned to obey your voice. I took a detour and headed to St. Louis, while telling You, "just ten minutes, Jesus, that's all I have."

I entered the Blessed Sacrament, I knelt in front of You, and we had a good ten minute conversation. Just as I was ready to leave, I heard the rain start pounding on the roof. "This is not funny, Jesus," I thought. "Now, how am I going to get out of here?" I had an umbrella, but it sounded like it was raining pretty heavy. I decided to give You five more minutes. I sat patiently in the chair, while praying to You to please stop the rain.

After five minutes, I left. It was pouring outside and windy too. "What do You want, Jesus? You know I need to get home." I waited a few minutes to see if the rain subsided. I checked my weather App and when I saw that it was going to be raining for at least another 35 minutes, I decided to leave. And just then, here comes Father Kish. I had not seen him in a while. Since he retired five years ago, he only helps at St. Louis occasionally. I asked him if he was leaving, and he said "yes." He didn't have an umbrella so I offered to walk him to his car. He said not to worry, that he had a jacket. But it was raining so hard and he was carrying all these papers, I knew he would get soaked. I told him, "I'm leaving now and it's no trouble at all." As a matter of fact, I was parked right next to him. I walked him to his car, I asked him how he was doing and where he was living now, he thanked me and we both went our separate ways. Now I know why You needed me to go to St. Louis. And I'm so glad that I obeyed You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Finding You in any Corner of the World

"We are the holy Church. But I do not say ‘we’ as though to indicate only we who are here, you who have just been listening to me. I mean all of us who are here and by the grace of God faithful Christians in this church, that is, in this city; all those in this region, in this province, across the sea, all those in the whole world. Such is the Catholic Church, our true mother, the true spouse of so great a husband." — St. Augustine

August 7, 2011

Dear Jesus:

Today, I write to You from San Francisco. We arrived two days ago. This first week it's just Rafe, Alex and me. Chabeli is in Los Angeles in a conference. She is representing UM. On Wednesday, she will fly to Seattle and will spend a couple of days with Rafi before we join them on Friday.

Since today is Sunday, we went to mass at "Notre Dame des Victoires," a cute little church in the French Quarter. The priest came over to welcome us. I guess it's such a small community that we stood out like a sore thumb. He asked us where we were from and how we had heard about the church. He then asked us if we wanted to take the offertory to the altar. Of course, we said yes.

I enjoyed his homily. Today's gospel reading was about when You walked on water. The priest gave us some background information about St. Matthew, the gospel writer not the apostle. This gospel was written about 50 years after your death. Your church was experiencing persecution from the Romans and the people were questioning whether it was worth it to remain being a Christian. The priest said that the boat represents your church and how the storm is shaking it from side to side. Yet, You came and You calmed the storm. Peter, as long as he trusted You, was able to walk on water. When he doubted, he began to drown. It's the same with us. As long as we place our trust in You, we can weather the storm and make your kingdom a better place.

It was good to attend mass the three of us together. I'm happy to belong to the Catholic Church where I know that I can find a community in any corner of the world.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 14, 2011

Dear Jesus:

Today, I write to You from Seattle. I thought we wouldn't be able to go to mass because the morning became complicated. Chabeli, Alex and I ended up going by ourselves, while Rafael and Rafi took care of all the pending issues related to his moving out of the apartment he was renting while doing a summer internship at Microsoft.

After eating at the hotel's breakfast buffet, Rafe dropped us off at St. Louise Catholic Church. We were a few minutes late but as soon as we walked in, I knew something was wrong. The church was almost empty, and there was no priest. It turned out that the mass was at 11. The phone App gave me the wrong time of 10:30. This gave us some silent time for personal prayer before the mass began.

As we sat there, one of the ushers approached us and asked us if we wanted to take the offertory. Two Sunday's in a row. We have never been asked at our own parish, but here, we must have a sign in our forehead that either says that we are visitors or holy holy. It is an honor to take the gifts to your altar, Jesus.

Rafe and Rafi picked us up right after mass. They had been able to resolve all the pending issues. The only thing left was a bag filled with Rafi's clothing that he wanted to donate. We were not sure what we would do with them but I figured that You would lead us to the right person or organization that needed it. We headed towards the stadium because the boys had tickets to watch a baseball game. There was no place to park so we drove around and we ran straight into a Salvation Army warehouse. Was this heavenly intervention or what? You never cease to amaze me.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 7, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I always love to go to mass when we are on vacation. It's great to see that we are all one body and even though we do not know each other, we are all connected by our Catholic faith. I especially love to attend mass when we are in a different country. Even if I don't understand the language, I can follow the mass.

One of my favorite memories happened in Hawaii. We went to mass and everyone knew we were visitors. After mass, everyone came to talk to us and welcome us to their parish. We felt right at home. We were being welcomed by our Christian family. They were so happy to see us, as if they knew us and had not seen us in a very long time. It gave us a very good feeling. It was like experiencing your Kingdom right here on earth.

I imagine that when someone arrives in heaven they receive the same welcome. All the people in heaven rejoice at each new arrival. And they are greeted and embraced because they are part of the heavenly family and they are finally home.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Thank You for This Beautiful World

"All the things in this world are gifts of God, created for us, to be the means by which we can come to know him better, love him more surely, and serve him more faithfully."— St. Ignatius of Loyola

July 8, 2010

Dear Jesus:

I feel rested and relaxed. How different from the last time I wrote to You when we were getting ready to tent the house for termites. Today, I'm writing from the beach apartment we rented for two weeks in Hallandale Beach. The view from where I'm sitting right now is magnificent. You have provided for us a beautiful world. Thank You. Humans, with their intelligence, have also created great things, even though there is no comparison. But I'm looking at the inter-coastal with all the buildings and houses and it's truly spectacular.

I enjoyed the past five days with the whole family. Rafe took a couple of days from work, which he combined with the long weekend. He was able to rest which is something that he truly needed. I worry about him because he works too hard.

Chabeli and Alex went to work the last two days but the rest of the time they were here. And Rafi arrived last Friday night and he has been here with us. It's been good having all three kids around. We had family and friends over for the Fourth of July. We enjoyed the beach during the day and watched the fireworks at night. Maricela brought an ice cream cake so we also celebrated my birthday.

Today, I'm by myself with Penny. Rafi stayed at the house last night with Chabeli and his friend Paul. Rafe and Alex left to work. I will enjoy the solitude.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 5, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Thank You for another relaxing and peaceful summer. Let's keep it this way, please.

Thank You for all your blessings. Thank You for this beautiful world that we get to enjoy every day.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven: Creating Perfect Babies

5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you" Jeremiah 1:5

May 21, 2009

Dear Jesus:

I read something today in the book I've been reading about Rafi's illness. It talked about genetic studies they are doing to try to identify the gene that causes this illness. They may even be able to identify it in fetuses before they are even born. The positive is that treatment can start much earlier. The negative is that parents may choose abortion if they find out that their babies may suffer from this illness.

It made me think: what if I had known that Rafi was going to suffer from this illness when I was pregnant with him? Of course, I would have had him. No doubt in my mind about that. In all three of my pregnancies, I voluntarily chose not to go through with the testing that would determine if the babies would be born with a problem. I would have never chosen abortion over life just because one of my babies would be less than perfect. Therefore, the only difference in finding out twenty years ago and finding out now, is that I would have learned everything about this illness sooner, and I would have attempted to find the best treatment earlier.

I thank You Jesus for Rafi, for his life, for his love, for his kindness, for his mind, for his brain, for everything that makes him who he is. I place him in your hands once more, Jesus. Please enlighten him and us, to make the best choices for his future. Holy Spirit, please fill him with your fire and guide him towards making the right decisions. Please help him to make the right selections to finish his education and help us to guide him towards the right path.

Rafi is your sacred creation. I love him and care for him deeply. Please give me the energy and strength to stand by him in the good and in the bad. And allow me to step back when he needs to walk alone.

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 4, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Yesterday, it was all over the news and in the front page of many newspapers that "scientists for the first time have successfully edited genes in human embryos to repair a common and serious disease-causing mutation, producing apparently healthy embryos." (1)

"The new experiment used a powerful new gene-editing technique to correct a genetic defect behind a heart disorder that can cause seemingly healthy young people to suddenly die from heart failure." (2)

As You well know, my hubby has this genetic defect, known as hypertrophic cardiomyopathy (HCM), in his heart. It was discovered when he was in his 30s, and since it's hereditary, our children have all had echocardiograms to rule it out. They need to continue checking themselves because unfortunately, the fact that they don't have it today doesn't mean that they can't develop it in the future.

When I heard the news, I was happy because this means that if our future grandchildren have this gene, it can be repaired before they are even born. But it also worried me because this is just the beginning. If human genes can be edited, how far will we go? "Some might try to design babies with certain traits, like greater intelligence or athleticism." (1)

Just like many parents nowadays choose abortion when they find out that the baby they are expecting suffers from an incurable illness, like Down Syndrome, this may cause the total opposite, where people with means will try to create the perfect babies with enhanced traits. It may even create a great abyss between people with disabilities and "perfect" people. Will people with disabilities get rejected from society because they are less than perfect?

Oh Jesus, when God gave us intelligence and free will, did He know what He was getting into? I guess when we use it for good, all is well. But many humans sure love to play God and I'm very concerned about the ethical consequences that all this human genetic engineering may have in the future. Yes, we all want perfect babies, but how far will we go to create that "perfect" baby? God help us!!!

I love You, Jesus!!!

Sources:

(1) New York Times 8-2-17 "In Breakthrough, Scientists Edit a Dangerous Mutation From Genes in Human Embryos"

(2) NPR 8-2-17 "Scientists Precisely Edit DNA In Human Embryos To Fix A Disease Gene"

Letters to Heaven: Purified Silver

"He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver, and he will purify the descendants of Levi and refine them like gold and silver." Malachi 3:3

August 3, 2009

Dear Jesus:

Today, I'm in a really bad mood. I don't know why. It's not like I can pinpoint it to a specific event. I'm just upset. I wish I could control my emotions the same way that I can control the lights. If I'm sad, I can push a switch and be happy. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way.

Yes, it's all about the attitude. If I have a positive attitude, I can control my emotions and I can avoid being upset. I am not a robot, though. I'm only human. Once in a while, I have the right to be mad, plain and simply mad. It's hard to have it together all the time.

When the kids were little, I used to have to do a lot of running around. I was looking forward to sitting back and relaxing more once they got older. But instead, it's gotten worst. Today, I had to run a lot of errands, and at the end of the day, I had to wait, and wait, and wait, and wait. The day was hot and muggy. I guess, all of this contributed to my pissy mood.

Sorry for "la descarga," Jesus. There's no one else I can turn to. I'm the one that needs to have it all under control, remember?

I love You, Jesus!!!

August 3, 2017

Dear Jesus:

There is an e-mail that I have received many times that talks about silver. In order for silver to attain its purity, it needs to be placed in the fire. The more it burns, the more it shines. The silversmith has to be very patient. It takes a long time, a lot of heat to achieve complete purity. The silversmith knows it's ready when he can see his own reflection in the silver.

That summer of 2009, You kept us in the fire for a very long time. It took a long time to purify us. There were days when I was very angry at You, and other times when I was upset at no one in particular. I just didn't know how much longer we could withstand the flames. I screamed, I whined, and I complained. But You were very patient with me.

It was so painful to see Rafi suffering. I realize now that You were purifying him too. He is your precious silver. As You burned him with your fire, You provided the strength for him to withstand the pain and the heat. And eventually, he came out shining bright. Today, I can clearly see your reflection on him.

Thank You, Jesus, for helping me with the pain. You went through much more pain than us as You carried your cross and when You were crucified. You handled it with a lot of dignity and You taught me how to handle my pain with dignity, even though it took me a long time to learn. Thank You for not giving up on me.

I love You, Jesus!!!