I woke up today thinking of Joseph. My dear Joseph. When he was chosen to be my husband, he was living in Jerusalem. He is a native of Nazareth, and one of the descendants of the royal race of David. He is thirty-three years of age. He is known by all in Nazareth for the utmost purity of his life, holy and irreprehensible in the eyes of God and of men.
He returned to Nazareth for the betrothal. The first time that I saw him, I was by the river. I found him to be very handsome and modest. He had not seen me yet because he was wetting a piece of wood in the waters of the river. His eyes and hair are brown, the color of nutmeg. His nose is very Jewish and he wears a thick beard. He is very timid. He must have felt my eyes on him because he suddenly turned around and his face turned the color of a ripe tomato. He smiled shyly and called out to me: “Shalom, Mary!” He then sat on top of a rock, slipped, and felt unto the river. I had to hold back a laugh because I could tell that he was very embarrassed.
I had just turned fourteen when the espousal took place. I wished my Father Joachim had been with me by my side, but he was called by God when I was still very young. It’s been six months since our engagement, but I still clearly remember the first words that Joseph said to me immediately after our betrothal took place: “My dear Mary. I give thanks to the Lord Most High for the favor of having designed me as your husband. I find myself without merits, and I judge myself unworthy to be in your company; but our God, who can raise up the lowly whenever He wishes, showed His mercy to this unworthy servant. I desire and hope, relying on your discretion and virtue, that you will help me to show Him my gratitude in serving Him with an upright heart. Hold me, therefore, as your servant, and by the true love which I feel for you, I beg of you to be patient with my deficiencies in the fulfillment of the domestic duties and of other things, which as a worthy husband, I should know how to perform; tell me, my dear spouse, what is your pleasure, in order that I may fulfill it.”
I was taken aback when I heard these words, but with a humble heart, I answered him: “My master and dear spouse, I am fortunate, that the Most High has chosen you to be my husband. He has given me such evident manifestation of His Will, that I am to serve you.”
I have engraved in my heart how the grass smiled at that moment, and how the sun exploded in happiness at such humble manifestation of our commitment to each other. Joseph looked into my eyes, and my soul was united to his. It was just a second, but I knew in that instant that I loved him. His hands found mine, and I knew that God had chosen for me the most humble and caring man that He could find in the entire earth. And thus my heart accepted him as my spouse.
In Jerusalem, Joseph had learnt the trade of carpentering as being a respectable and proper way of earning the sustenance in life. He was poor in earthly possessions, but he would continue to exercise his trade in Nazareth in order to be able to maintain us.
I cannot stop thinking how disappointed he will be when he finds out that I am expecting a child when we are yet to live together. It is our Jewish custom for a betrothal to last a few months before the actual marriage takes place. In Israel, a marriage is more like a business between two families. If the two families are affluent, they would exchange jewelry, money, houses, and even slaves. The transaction between our families was more modest because we are very poor.
Once the arrangements were made, I went with my aunt and uncle to Joseph’s house. He placed a coin in my hand with a smile on his lips, and he said these words: “With this coin, you are now my betrothed.” Then, Joseph’s father blessed us in front of various witnesses, and he said: “You are now Joseph’s spouse.” From that moment on, the real wedding preparations began. This gives us an opportunity for us to get to know each other better before actually living together. And now, I will need to tell Joseph that I am with child. How can I explain to him that even though I am expecting, I am still a Virgin? Joseph is a good man, but this will be very difficult for him to accept. Will he break up our betrothal and repudiate me in front of everyone?
I have to stop thinking of all these negative scenarios before they actually take place. And right then and there, I knew what I had to do. I remembered the angel’s last words to me: “Your relative Elizabeth has also conceived a son in her old age; and she who was called barren is now in her sixth month. For nothing will be impossible with God.”
I must go to Elizabeth. Even though she is old enough to be my mother, we are very close. I will stay with her to help her in the last stage of her pregnancy and to assist with the delivery. Those three months will help me to pray, meditate and choose the proper way to give the news to Joseph.
It is now midnight, and I prostrate myself in the presence of the Most High, to commence my accustomed daily prayers and holy exercises. I pray to my Lord that I may be guided in all my actions to become the Mother of God. And I pray that He enlightens me when the time comes for me to unveil my secret to Joseph.
Tomorrow will be a new day, and the Lord will guide my steps.
Reflection:
What do I do when the Lord changes my plans? Do I get upset at the Lord or do I allow Him to guide my steps through the new plan? Do I pray for discernment? I must trust that God knows exactly what I need and He will lead the way.
Copyright © 2019 Christy Romero. All rights reserved.
Resources from the following books are being used on this journey:
1. The Mystical City of God: A Popular Abridgement of the Divine History and Live of the Virgin Mother of God by Venerable Mary of Agreda
2. The World’s First Love: Mary, Mother of God by Fulton J. Sheen
3. Las Palabras Calladas: Diario de Maria de Nazaret by Pedro Miguel Lamet
All Bible references are from the New American Standard Bible (NASB) unless otherwise specified.
No comments:
Post a Comment