Letters to Heaven during the Easter Season: I Don't Want Them Anymore

“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”—LUKE 12:25–26

April 22, 2006

Dear Jesus:

Here I am spending time with You in the Blessed Sacrament. I can see You, yet I cannot feel You. Maybe I'm trying to feel You in a super natural way and that's not going to happen. Maybe the peace that I feel inside of me is You.

This past year, my prayer life and my communication with You have improved a lot. I need that half an hour of meditation before I begin my day. I feel much more calm and at peace when I place my trust in You. As long as I make time for You everything falls into place.

As You well know, I am a worrier. I worry about everything. I worry about my children. I worry about my husband. I worry about things that need to be done. I worry about lack of time. I worry about my work. I am always worrying about something. And I ask myself, why do I worry so much? What is the point? All I need to do is hand my worries to You. 

You will take care of my children. They are your children too. You gave them to me so of course You will take care of them. 

You will also take care of my husband. You always have, why would You stop now? You have always provided a good job for him. You have always helped him when he needs to make an important decision. I know that You will continue to take good care of him. 

Lack of time has always been a struggle in my life. The days don't seem to have enough hours and the nights have even less. Maybe I try to do too much in a day. You give me enough hours to accomplish the important things. Those that remain undone, they must not be so important after all. As long as I find time for You in my day, and time to spend with my family, all is good. The rest is secondary.

My work will still be there tomorrow so why should I worry so much about it? What I can't finish today, I will take care of tomorrow. And if I can't get to it tomorrow, there's always the next day.

If I worry less during the day, I will be able to sleep better at night. So from now on, I'm worrying less so I can sleep more. You can have my worries, Jesus. I don't want them anymore.

I love You, Jesus!!!

April 28, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Worry has always been a heavy burden in my life. That is the reason why this year, for Lent, I decided that instead of giving up chocolate, I would give up worrying. I transferred my worries to You. And I don't want them back, thank You very much. You can keep them. Life is much easier when You carry my worries.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during the Easter Season: I Feel Gloomy

"You have all eternity to experience the presence of God, but you have a very short time to do something for Him." Mother Angelica

April 6, 2008

Dear Jesus:

Lent is over. I must confess to You that I do not enjoy Lent. Lent is a gloomy time. It's a season of suffering. Meditating on your passion always makes me sad. But I understand that we have to go through the passion and the suffering in order to fully enjoy and comprehend the Resurrection.

At the beginning of Lent, I told You that I wanted to do three things. The first one was to abstain from nagging. I think I succeeded because it was in the back of my mind constantly so when I felt into my bad nagging habit, I realized it and consciously tried to stop.

The second one was to pray more. I'm proud that I have gotten Rafe to pray with me as we walk in the mornings. I used to pray in silence or by myself. Now, we pray together like we used to do at the beginning of our marriage. I also wanted to attend one additional mass during the week and that was difficult. But I managed to do it five out of the seven weeks of Lent.

The last thing I wanted to do during Lent was "almsgiving" of either time or treasure. I couldn't do it with my time so now I must do it with my treasure. I have a very short time on earth to do something for You. I believe that helping those in need is doing something for You. Only then, will I truly enjoy the Resurrection.

I love You, Jesus!!!

April 24, 2017

Dear Jesus:

This past week, I have been in a gloomy mood. Usually, it's the other way around. I look forward to Easter because it marks the end of Lent. This year, for some reason, I felt sad and empty when Lent ended.

Even though I was gloomy, it was a busy week. Tax season got extended until April 18th, so I was pretty busy on Monday and Tuesday. Then I gave myself three days off. I need that "ME" time once in a while. I hosted a prayer lunch on Wednesday, went to the zoo on Thursday and attended a funeral mass for tia Carmen on Friday. Tia Carmen was one of Rafe's many aunts and one of my favorites. She was very close to my father-in-law. She always had a joy for life and a smile on her face. Even after losing one of her daughters to cancer a few years ago, she never lost her spirit. And as one of her niece's said, "she was la tia del cache," because she was always "emperifollada" (all dressed-up). As the priest said at the mass, she leaves behind quite a legacy of faith. And a beautiful family of daughters, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Nevertheless, we will all miss her tremendously.

Now that Lent is over, I must find my rhythm once again. We are now in the season of Easter, the 50 days between Easter and Pentecost. I think part of the reason I have been gloomy is because in the past, I have been hit hard right after Lent. So I approach this season with trepidation. My dad was diagnosed with cancer on April 15, 2014. And eight years ago today, we received a very tough call about Rafi. So You have to understand why I'm a little scared as I enter the Easter season.

Every day, I read a meditation from a little book called "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young. Yesterday's reflection touched me. "Keep your eyes on me... I never lead you to do something without equipping you for the task. That is why it's so important to seek My will in everything you do... In order to know My will, you must spend time with Me..." I promise to spend time with You, Jesus, during this Easter season. You are all that matters, and no matter what curve balls life throws at me, as long as You are at the center, we will get through it together. And You reaffirmed this in today's reflection: "I am always with you, so you have no reason to be afraid."

Show me what You need me to do for You. And help me to trust that You are in control. I have no reason to be afraid or to feel gloomy because You resurrected and You are always with me.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Happy Easter

The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples: ‘He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.’ Now I have told you.” —MATTHEW 28:5–7

Easter Sunday: April 24, 2011

Dear Jesus:

Happy Easter! Today we celebrate your resurrection. It's one of the most important days of our Catholic faith... And it's raining outside. That in itself is very unusual. I don't remember too many rainy Easter's . 

Two years ago today we received the phone call that would change our lives forever. I can split my life in two: before April 24, 2009 and after April 24, 2009. Before, I lived a carefree life. I had worries, but they were not serious. Health was not too much of a concern. My biggest worry was when the kids went out and didn't get home until the wee hours. I also lived a very well planned life. I knew, from one year to the next, where we would go on vacation. I always planned ahead. Sometimes plans had to be changed or altered, but I pretty much knew what I would be doing the following day, the following week, the following month, and even the following year.

Since April 24, 2009, I'm scared to plan. I have had to learn to live an unplanned life... And I don't like it. I don't like to plan things from one day to the next. That is not me. I like organization. I like to have options and when things are done last minute, there are not too many options available.

I also worry a whole lot more since that day. I know that I need to trust You, leave it all in your hands... I know all that Jesus, and trust me, I try. But it's hard for me because once again, that is not me. I'm a worry wart. And I have come a long way. I don't even worry as much when the kids are out. Sometimes, I even fall asleep so deeply that I don't even hear when they get home. But I do worry about the future and the extended consequences of this illness that caught us all by surprise.

I am hopeful that it will all turn out fine because in these past two years, You have performed miracles. But allow me to worry and forgive me for worrying. I try, but the worry bugs just won't leave me alone.

Thank You, Jesus, for giving your life for us and for showing us that there is hope even when it all seems hopeless.

I love You, Jesus!!! Happy Easter!!!

Easter Sunday: April 16, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Happy Easter! And thank You for allowing me to have a mostly worry-free Lent. Thank You for teaching me how to trust and how to let go and let You take charge of my life and the lives of my loved ones.

Yesterday, I witnessed a miracle. After two months of waiting for April, the giraffe, to give birth to her calf, it finally happened on Easter weekend. What an amazing gift. I had a front row seat, through a live video cam, to witness your beautiful creation in all its glory. It took about three hours since hooves first appeared until the calf was all the way out. And within an hour, he was on his feet, nursing from his mama. But what amazed me the most was Mama April's love. Even while just two hooves were out, she kept turning her neck and licking her baby. And when the head was out, she was constantly kissing him. And as soon as the baby dropped to the floor, she turned around and began to lick him, encouraging him to get up. It was so beautiful to watch. A perfect gift on this weekend when we are celebrating your resurrection and we are celebrating new life.

In the past eight years, I have witnessed many miracles. What seemed at the time to be the end of the world, was just the beginning. We just had to adapt and learn to live differently. And You have carried us in more ways than I could possibly explain. Yes, my Rafi has a serious illness and he needs to always be on high alert, but he has taught me so much. He has never said, "why me?" He never complained, even when he was at his worst. He had to take a year off from school, but he gained so much by it. In that year, he found his vocation, and when he returned to college, in one of those Computer Engineering classes, he met his love, his soon-to-be-wife, his Emily. I have so much to be thankful for. When life seems to turn upside down, it's just a detour on the road. And through his illness, I have met so many amazing people. And You have shown me that You always have a plan. And You can write straight out of crooked lines.

I love You, Jesus!!! Happy Easter!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Today, We Wait

“Be watchful, stand firm in your faith, be courageous, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.” 1 Corinthians 16:13-14

Holy Saturday: April 7, 2012

Dear Jesus:

Today is a very sad day. After seeing You on the cross on Good Friday, today must have been a day of helplessness for your Mother and for your disciples. They probably felt defeated. They probably thought that it all ended on the cross.

When we have a heavy cross to carry, we feel the same way. We feel helpless and defeated. We wonder, what is the point? Is there any sense in all this suffering? But the truth is that the cross is the root of Christianity. When we refuse to accept our crosses, we reject You. We have to accept our crosses in order to be able to follow You. 

Our society is too comfortable. We don’t want to give up our comforts. Yet, we have to carry our crosses with dignity and perseverance because we will be saved through the cross.

Just like your disciples and your blessed Mother stood firm on their faith on Holy Saturday, we must do the same. We have to be courageous and we have to be strong. No matter how heavy is our cross, no matter how difficult it is to carry the burden, we can’t give up. We have to surrender all our suffering to You. Sometimes we even have to surrender the thing or the person that we love the most.

We have to join our sufferings to yours on the cross in order to rise with You in the Resurrection. We have to do so in love. We have to offer all our love to You. Even if we are suffering, we have to love with all our heart. When we love and we have compassion for others, when we rise above our sufferings and we love and care for others who are suffering too, we will be able to see your face. Love and compassion are the keys that will open the doors to Heaven.

Today, we wait.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Holy Saturday: April 15, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Today, we wait. We wait, just like Mama Mary waited 2,000 years ago. I'm sure she felt lonely, sad, and scared, but I'm also sure that she trusted You. Please, teach us to trust the way your blessed Mother trusted.

Today, we sit with Mama Mary and we wait. After the cross, comes the Resurrection. That is our hope and our trust.

I love you, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Face to Face

"God works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will." Ephesians 1:11

Good Friday: April 18, 2014

Dear Jesus:

Today is Good Friday. We remember your death on the cross. I'm sorry for all the times that I have sinned because every time I sin, I nail You to the cross.

This week has been a week of bad news. First, Meli's uncle passed away in a very tragic way. He was so young. Please Jesus accept him into your kingdom and give him everlasting life. I pray for his whole family, especially his three kids who are now left without a dad.

The second bad news was about my dad. He was diagnosed with angio-sarcoma, a very rare and aggressive form of cancer which attacks the blood vessels. Jesus, whatever the outcome, please have mercy on him and don't let him suffer. He has always been a very loving man. He stepped in to be my dad and he always did a great job. He loved me as his own daughter all my life. And I love him as a father. Please, lighten up his cross. If this is the end for him, please accept him into your kingdom and wait for him with open arms. I love him with all my heart. I don't want to lose him, but I prefer to let him go than to see him suffer. Jesus, please carry him through and give my mom the strength that she will need to endure this cross on her journey.

I love You, Jesus, and I await for the day when I can meet You face to face.

Good Friday: April 14, 2017

Dear Jesus:

My dad's journey was tough but You allowed us to enjoy him two more years. Eventually, he lost the battle, but he went in peace and I have no doubt that You welcomed him into your kingdom with open arms.

Today, we celebrated a peaceful Good Friday. For a few years now, Rafe and I have started a new tradition. We do our own Good Friday pilgrimage by visiting five different churches and praying one mystery of the rosary at each church. Our pilgrimage today took us from Hallandale Beach to Ft. Lauderdale. We started at St. Matthew where we prayed and meditated on your agony in the garden. We then headed to Little Flower in Hollywood where we pondered about your scourging at the pillar. Our next stop was St. Maurice at Dania Beach. Here we remembered your crowning of thorns. We went on to St. Jerome, where we accompanied You on the carrying of the cross. And we finished at St. Sebastian, where we prayed the last mystery, your crucifixion, and we stayed for the service of the Passion.

This year, Good Friday had a special meaning for me. I just finished a five-week Bible study on the movie "The Passion." It was very powerful. So today, as I listened to John's scripture about your passion, the movie was being replayed in my mind. Jesus, how where You able to endure such pain and such sorrow? And as the priest said, "You did so willingly." You knew what was about to happen to You and You accepted it. How much You love us that You accepted the ultimate sacrifice for the love of us.

Thank You Jesus, for giving your life for me. I don't deserve You. I hope one day, I have the honor of being able to meet You face to face.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Embarking on A Life of Prayer

"Because most of God’s important work happens unnoticed, we should be careful to water that seed of faith even when we don’t see impressive results right away. We can trust that God will bring the growth in his time and in his fashion." The Word Among Us January 27, 2017

Holy Thursday: April 13, 2006

Dear Jesus:

I have been reading a book titled "The Cloister Walk" by Kathleen Norris. My sister in Christ, Mercy, gave me the book during the last Emmaus, and it has been a wonderful book to read during Lent. "A life of prayer must work the earth of the heart." As I reflect on this sentence, I can't help but think of my prayer life. As I look back upon my life, all 43 years of it, I can't remember a time when I did not pray. As far back as I can recall, I was always praying, or at least, I thought I was praying because I knew how to pray to the guardian angel, and I knew the basic prayers like the "Our Father" and the "Hail Mary."

But as I meditate on this sentence, I realize that I have never worked on the earth of my heart. I have always attempted to plant prayer in my heart without fertilizing the earth first. No wonder my prayer life has never been too deep. If I'm to lead a successful life of prayer, I must start by preparing the earth of my heart. I must clean out the weeds inside the earth, remove the rocks, and remove anything else in there that will suffocate the prayer. I must fertilize the earth by nourishing it with daily bible readings, meditations, learning about You, about your Mom, and about the saints. And I must water it daily by participating in the Sacraments, praying the rosary, and spending time with You in the Blessed Sacrament. Only then will my heart be ready to embark on a life of prayer.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Holy Thursday: April 13, 2017

Dear Jesus:

My life of prayer has come a long way in the past eleven years. I was walking baby steps back then. Now, I'm finally learning to walk a little faster. Maybe in another eleven years, I'll be able to run.

The turning point for me was when I signed up for that first Bible class back in 2009. The scriptures have taken my prayer life into a whole new dimension. I feel as if I was blind and now, I can see. Maybe I still need glasses, but I'm finally starting to distinguish things that were once hidden from me.

Today, as I celebrate your Last Supper, I want to offer You my heart. Please continue to fertilize the earth of my heart by nourishing it with your Word and your Love. And if I ever deny You, like Peter did, or betray You, like Judas did, please have mercy on me.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Dance With Me

"Let them praise his name with dancing, making melody to him with tambourine and lyre." 
     -Psalm 149:3

Holy Week: Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Dear Jesus:

Thank You for extending me the invitation to participate in this Holy Week Retreat. It is an oasis in the busy-ness of my life. Thank You for bringing me here. 

Thank You for the gift of life. Thank You for being present at my birth. Thank You for embracing me and loving me since the second that I was conceived. 

Thank You for the parents that You chose for me. Thank You because they said "yes" to life. They chose to bring me into the world. Even though their life was in turmoil, they trusted You and they said, "let your will be done, not ours."

Thank You also for giving me the wonderful grandparents that You gave me. They were always present and they were always a big part of my life.

Thank You because You have always danced with me. When I've needed to tango, you have danced the tango with me. When I've needed to dance "merengue," you have done so willingly, shaking and moving with me to the beat. When I've needed to slow dance, You have danced cheek to cheek with me. When I've been too tired to dance, You've sat next to me, and You have held my hand. Thank You because You have always waltzed through life with me. You have always been the most willing of partners.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Holy Week: Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Will You dance with me? I need to dance cheek to cheek with You. Tomorrow, we start the Triduum. Help me to get close to You on the cross. Help me to release all the anxiety that I've been carrying. I need to heal in order to enjoy your resurrection on Sunday.

On Easter Sunday, I hope I'm ready to join the celebration, and dance a good "merengue" with You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Getting Back to Basics

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” —LUKE 10:41–42

Holy Week: Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Dear Jesus:

It's tax day! And I'm done! I finished all the extensions yesterday. Now, what I don't understand is this. If I'm done with tax season, why did I wake up at 4:30 in the morning? Really? What's wrong with me? I'm supposed to be relaxed now and sleeping like a baby. I guess that's not going to happen. So what better time to spend some quiet time with You on this Tuesday of Holy Week?

Today's meditation from Father Barron talks about the desert. "Flowers in the Desert," he calls it. The desert symbolizes many things but the one that touch me the most is: "an ordering of our priorities in life and a simplification; a getting back to basics."

I have a tendency to complicate my life. Like Martha, I worry about too many things. And I need to re-order my priorities. Lately, my priority has been work. I need to re-group, simplify and get back to the basics. And it starts today.

I'm starting my day praying to You. My family is always at the top of my list, but today, I'm going to be a little selfish and pamper myself. I'm going to go to Claire's house to pray, eat and share time with my community of faith.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Holy Week: Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Twenty-eight years ago today, my abuelo Venancio passed away. One of the most valuable lessons he taught me was to enjoy the basic pleasures of life. My grandfather was a very simple man. He was happy watching a game of baseball or soccer on TV, eating a good plate of "potaje" or smoking his pipe. I got my love of reading from him. He used to read "Selecciones" (Reader's Digest) from beginning to end. He enjoyed life to the fullest in a very simple way.

Today, the accountant I share office space with, asked me if I would be working on Easter Sunday. "No way," I answered him. "I'm also not working on Good Friday or Holy Saturday." I have one more week of 10-hour work days, but those three days will be for You. The way I'm looking at it, this year You gave me two more work days so I could spend Easter weekend enjoying the celebration of Your Resurrection.

My grandfather was not a very religious man, but he had his priorities straight. Sundays were for rest, for family and for enjoying life. And I learned the lesson well.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: You Must Be at the Center

"A division occurred in the crowd because of Him." John 7:43

Holy Week: Monday, April 6, 2009

Dear Jesus:

It's Monday of Holy Week and I have come to visit You in the Blessed Sacrament. I feel such peace in my heart.

I was meditating about the events that took place 2,000 years ago. The people were very divided because of You. Unfortunately, today, we are still as divided. There is division among Christians. Even, within the Catholic Church, there is a lot of separation.

There is also a lot of discord among families. I know parents that don't talk to their children. There's a lot of sibling rivalry that causes a lot of pain and anger. Grandparents have been forgotten in nursing homes. Most families don't even have time to sit down and enjoy a dinner together.

A few times during your ministry, You said that You came to divide. "Do you think that I have come to bring peace to the earth? No, I tell you, but rather division!" Luke 12:51. But I don't believe that is what You wanted. You wanted to unite, not to divide. But You also know us very well, and You know that not all of us will accept your teachings. That alone will create division. 

We need to bring You back to the center of our lives. We need to place You in the midst of our families and our churches. If we do that, instead of pain and anger residing in our hearts, love will take its place.

Thank You Jesus for walking this Lenten journey with me. Thank You for teaching me the way back to love. When we forget how to love, we walk without direction. But with You at the center, life has direction once again.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Holy Week: Monday, April 10, 2017

Dear Jesus:

You are asking us to unite. Please help us to remember that always. We get so caught up on trivialities, that we forget what is truly important. There are so many families in pain because they are so divided. And most of the time, it all began with something insignificant.

Today, on this Holy Monday, I want to pray for all families. May reconciliation take place and may the gaps dissipate. May You reign at the center of all families once again.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: We Must Become Like Donkeys

"Go into the village ahead of you, and immediately you will find a donkey tied, and a colt with her; untie them and bring them to me." Matthew 21:2

Holy Week: Palm Sunday, April 13, 2014

Dear Jesus:

I was supposed to go to work today but I decided to play hooky. Today is for You. Today is Palm Sunday.

This year, I have not had the best Lent. I'm ashamed to say that I didn't give up anything. I haven't done any serious meditations, other than the ones that I receive by email and the book I'm reading. I didn't even go to confession yesterday as I had planned. I've been too overwhelmed to give much thought to Lent. I need to change that. Holy Week starts today. I must pray more and get closer to You.

I love You, Jesus. This week is going to be hectic for me but please, help me not to lose focus. And my focus needs to be on You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Holy Week: Palm Sunday, April 9, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Yesterday, I finally made it to confession. I've been wanting to go to confession all Lent, but there was always something getting on the way. But this time, I made it my priority, and I didn't allow anything or anyone to stop me. It feels good to begin Holy Week with a clean conscience.

I also attended mass yesterday. Father Frank Permuy was the priest. I like him. He takes the simplest element from the reading, and turns it into a great homily. His homily yesterday was about the donkey. He said that it would not surprise him if Pope Francis declares next year the year of the donkey. Everyone was laughing. But then, he turned serious and told us that to get to You, we need to become like donkeys. You chose the most humble animal to enter into Jerusalem. In order to enter into Holy Week, we must also become humble, like the donkey. Just like your apostles untied the donkey to take him to You, we must untie ourselves from everything that is keeping us apart from You.

We are tied down by many things—by guilt, pride, selfishness or anxiety. Some of us are tied down by grudges, and we cannot forgive. Many of us are tied down to our smartphones and tablets, and we are unable to put those devices down. We need to be untied from what weighs us down.

Jesus, help us to become like donkeys so You can untie us and bring us to You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Keep Calm and Carry On

"Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass." Psalm 37:5

Week 5: April 6, 2014

Dear Jesus:

"Keep calm and carry on." What a great phrase. I first heard it when Chabeli was studying abroad in England. Now, it's popular here too. And Max Lucado titled one chapter in his book "God will carry you through," with this phrase. How appropriate for me at this time of the year.

"Keep calm and carry on." I need to keep repeating this phrase. And like Max Lucado suggests in his book, I am asking You, Jesus, to give me an index card sized plan. If I divide everything that I have to do in two to three simple steps per day, I can get through life. I know that You are in control and You are carrying me through.

As I continue to read about other people's struggles in the book, I have to stop and say: THANK YOU. Thank You for all the blessings. You love me so very much. Sometimes, I feel that I'm not worthy of so much love. But You don't give up on me.

Please, continue to love me, don't give up on me, and shower me with your merciful embrace. And please, please, help me to sleep at night.

I love You, Jesus.

Week 5: April 8, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Thank You because this year, sleep has not been a problem. I'm finally learning to truly "keep calm and carry on." I gave up worrying for this Lent, and even though there were moments when the "worry bugs" attacked me, overall, I've done pretty good. Now I just need to carry it beyond Lent.

"Keep calm and carry on." My motto for the rest of this year.

I love You, Jesus.

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Thank You for Teaching Us How to Love

"If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven, give good things to those who ask Him." Matthew 7:11

Week 5: March 15, 2008

Dear Jesus:

It's been almost two weeks since I have set some quiet time aside to be with You in solitude. I am at the peak of tax season and I feel my time dwindling by a thread. The best thing about the last two weeks is that I have been able to keep my Lenten commitment of attending one additional mass during the week. Last Saturday, I went to mass during the morning, and I also went to mass a couple of days ago to Church of the Little Flower. It had been one year since I had not visited Little Flower. It felt good to be home. This church holds many special memories. Each of my children has received two sacraments there. I have seen all three participate in "The Stations of the Cross." I have attended many school masses and many Sunday masses. It was also good to run into old friends.

Today, I feel very happy. My three "pollitos" are home. All three are sleeping in their beds right now. Mother Hen is content and at peace. This will only last three days. Even though Rafi is home for one week on spring break, Chabeli is leaving to New York on Tuesday. It will be the longest separation from her. She has been to Washington DC twice to attend the March for Life, but that was just for four days. On this trip, she will be gone for six days.

I am letting her go and I am entrusting her to You, Jesus. I release her to You to care for and protect her while she's away from us. Please keep her away from any danger. And help me to feel the peace of knowing that You are in control. I rely on You for everything, Jesus, and on this day, I entrust my daughter to You. I release her into your hands. Please Jesus, take care of my little girl while she is in New York.

Chabeli is looking forward to this trip. She is excited and that makes me feel good because normally, she doesn't like to travel. She has a hard time being away from home, so I know that this trip will be very good for her.

In the meantime, I will enjoy the three days that You have given me to have all my children together under the same roof.

Thank You, Jesus, for my beautiful family. Thank You for my hubby and for my children. They are my most prized possessions. Thank You for teaching me how to love with all my heart.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Week 5: April 7, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I am looking forward to this weekend. The past two weeks have been intense at work. I have been putting ten-hour work days, and I'm exhausted. I have ten days left of tax season, and then I can breathe.

But more than the end of tax season, I'm looking forward to Holy Week and Easter. I took a five-week study of the Passion, which I was able to fit in my very busy schedule, and I'm so happy I did because it was truly amazing. You are truly amazing. The love You feel for us cannot be compared to any love we humans have ever experienced. The sacrifice that You did for us... I have no words to Thank You.

I love my children more than life. I know that if I had to, I would give my life for them. But the Passion that You endured for us... I know that my body would not be able to endure it. Only with God's grace were You able to withstand so much pain.

And all You ask of us is that we love one another as You have loved us. And we can't even manage to do that simple task correctly.

Thank You, Jesus, for teaching us how to love. Thank You for the ultimate sacrifice.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: I'm Waiting Patiently

"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD."
 —PSALM 27:14

Week 5: April 3, 2014

Dear Jesus:

Nothing like the early morning hours to spend some time with You. Thank You for allowing me to sleep a little longer today. For the past three days, I have woken up at 3 am. Today, I slept until 5 am, and it was enough to make me feel rested.

I have been reading a book by Max Lucado titled "God Will Carry You Through." I love it. Thank You for your servant Max Lucado who is doing your will of spreading your word throughout the world. I heard him talk at the "Women of Faith" conference in Orlando. He was very inspirational so I bought his book.

The book is based on the story of Joseph. I just finished reading the chapter called "Waiting." It's inspired on the two years that Joseph waited for the butler to remember him and mention him to the Pharaoh. Two years in which Joseph's faith grew instead of getting weaker. We humans tend to be very impatient. We want things to happen in our time but we need to learn to trust You. Things will happen in your time, not ours.

Patience. It's such a difficult virtue.

Help me to be patient, Father. Help me to wait for You. Help me to be patient on every aspect of my life.

Help me to be patient as a wife.

Help me to be patient as a mother.

Help me to be patient as a daughter.

Help me to be patient as a sister.

Help me to be patient as an accountant.

Help me to be patient as a friend.

Help me to be patient today.

Help me to obtain this very difficult virtue. Show me how to be patient with myself. I don't need to be a perfectionist in everything I do.

I'm waiting patiently for You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Week 5: April 6, 2017

Dear Jesus:

I'm still trying to cultivate the virtue of patience. Thank You for being patient with me.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: You are my Guide and my Light

"Trust is a golden pathway to heaven. When you walk on this path, you live above your circumstances. My glorious Light shines more brightly on those who follow this path of Life." Sarah Young in Jesus Calling

Week 5: March 19, 2015

Dear Jesus:

Here I am visiting You in the Blessed Sacrament. I had not planned to come visit You today, but somehow, You led me here. After dealing with the heavy Miami traffic for the last hour, I needed this reprieve.

Last night, I had a really hard time falling asleep. I prayed the rosary, but it didn't help. I watched a movie, "Mom at Sixteen." I cried like an idiot but at least it calmed me down, and then I was able to sleep.

The reason why I couldn't sleep is because I'm anxious about many things. Today, I want to pray for two special intentions. The first one is related to Alex. He just applied to a program that combines Engineering and Business. It's a difficult program, and if he gets accepted, he will be 26 credits behind. But that is the least of my worries. I just want your plan for him to be fulfilled. If this is the program where You want him to end up, then please open the door and guide him in that direction. If You have something else in mind for him, then please show him what it is.

The second special intention is for Chabeli. She has decided to move out. I know she was thinking about it, but I didn't think it would happen until the summer. Now, all of a sudden, it may be happening next month. An opportunity has presented itself where she can get a fully furnished studio for a very reasonable price. It will be available by April 15th, and she needs to decide quickly. We are going to go with her tomorrow night to check out the place. Please, if this is not the right decision for her, close that door. If the place is not safe in any way, if she's going to be in any kind of danger, please open our eyes and allow us see it.

Jesus, You are my guide and my light when it comes to my children. They would not be where they are today if it wasn't for You. You have always shown us the way. Whenever we have been at a crossroad, You have led us in the right direction. I have no doubt that in these two situations, You will also help us make the right choice. I am placing all my trust on You.

I know that things will work out according to your plan. It's just that while we are in the process of making the decisions, I can't help but worry.

Keep them safe. Keep them happy. Take them by the hand and lead them on the path that will eventually take them to You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Week 5: April 5, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Thank You for answering my prayers two years ago for those special intentions. Alex got accepted into the Engineering program. He took four classes that summer in order to catch up. That didn't turn out to be such a good thing, but You taught him a big lesson through some growing pains. And eventually, he ended up combining Engineering with Real Estate. If it's your will, he will graduate at the end of this year.

Chabeli moved to the studio. When we went to check it out, we couldn't find anything wrong with the place. The neighborhood was safe. There were a lot of people in the area jogging, exercising and walking. The building had a high level of security which gave me peace of mind. Even though it was a studio, it was spacious and comfortable. It was definitely a good start-up place for her. She lived there for 18 months, and now she lives in a two bedroom apartment by the Miami River. I'm proud of my girl because she has become a very responsible and independent young lady.

As I continue this Lenten journey, I place my family in your hands. Please, Jesus, protect them always. Continue to be our guide and our light.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: I Surrender

"The human mind plans the way, but the Lord directs the steps."
          -Proverbs 16:9

Week 5: April 9, 2011

Dear Jesus:

Here I am with Rafe, visiting You in the Blessed Sacrament. We are by ourselves, everyone else left... And now, Rafe has to leave too so it's just You and me. I cherish this moment in your Holy Presence.

In two weeks, we will celebrate Easter. Thank You for giving your life for us. Thank You for conquering death. Thank You for staying with us in the Eucharist.

Thank You for the gift of faith. Thank You for walking this journey with me. Thank You for never abandoning me. Thank You for all the blessings that You bestow upon me each and every day.

Thank You for teaching me to trust You, even when I couldn't understand. When the road bended and twisted through the unknown, You calmed the fear in my heart. When my plans were crushed and I had to learn to live an unplanned life, You were there to guide me and to lead me. Thank You for teaching me to live a life that is fully directed by You. Thank You for teaching me to live by your will and not mine. Thank You for teaching me to surrender all to You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Week 5: April 2, 2017

Dear Jesus:

It's funny that after all this time, after all we've been through together, after all You've taught me, I still try to take control of my life once in a while. And every time, You crush my plans and You lead me in a totally different direction. You would think I would have gotten the message by now, but I'm so stubborn, that I still attempt to plan.

Last year was a perfect example. I was planning our trip to Eastern Europe to the last minute detail. But You had a different plan for us. You crushed our plans, and sent us to Italy instead. I'm not complaining, it was wonderful. But to arrange it in three weeks put me totally on edge. I wish my level of trust was at the level that I could just allow You to lead without planning in advance. But of course, I just can't. I can't fathom traveling without knowing where I'm going to spend the night. Some people actually do that. And I admire them. But that's just not me. I did allow You more control than I usually do, so I ended up making changes in the middle of the trip. And it was pretty awesome to discover the places that You took us to. Even getting lost, and encountering angels on our path was breathtaking.

This year, I made the decision to surrender all to You. But I'm beginning to get antsy because not much is happening. It's awesome to sit at your feet and just rest. But I feel that I should be planning something. I'm more of a Martha than a Mary. When I sit at your feet too long, I get restless. I need to know what I'm going to do tomorrow. I need to know where I will be three months from now. Of course, I know that the minute I begin to plan, You will interfere and change everything. So, what's the point?

In two weeks we will celebrate Easter. Show me what You want me to do for You during the Easter Season.

I surrender all to You.

I love You, Jesus!!!

Letters to Heaven during Lent: Here I am, Lord

"I have come to do your will.”
                   -Hebrews 10:9

Week 5: March 28, 2009

Dear Jesus:

Here I am, Lord! I have come to do your will.

I am here in the chapel at Manresa Retreat House keeping You company. I am in front of the Blessed Sacrament, where You are truly present in body and blood. I have come to be with You for a few hours.

First and foremost, I would like to pray for the Emmaus retreat that is taking place right now. I would like to pray for Gema and Ivonne who are facilitating this retreat. Allow them, Jesus, to be transparent so that the retreatants can see You through them. Allow them to lead and unite the team so that together they can represent your whole body. I want to pray for the team so that each one of them can perform the task that they have been assigned with great love. Allow them Jesus to be the best "mouth" or the best "ear" or the best "hand." It doesn't matter if they are a Martha or a Mary. You need them all. I would like to pray for the retreatants. May they open up their ears to hear your message. May they open up their hearts to make You the center of their lives. Allow them to realize that true peace and happiness can only be found in You.

The next thing that I would like to pray for is my family. Thank You for Rafe, my husband, partner, and best friend for the last 28 years. Thank You for giving me the best possible person to walk this journey with me. Guide him in his job to do the best possible work, to always be honest, and to show integrity in everything he does. Help him in his duties as a father. It is not an easy job but he is doing a wonderful one. He loves the kids, he disciplines them when he needs to, he plays with them, and he has their best interest at heart. God, I pray that You keep him healthy, strong, and always by my side. It would be very difficult to walk this journey without him.

Lord, thank You for my children. They are the best gift that You could have ever given me. Please, Jesus, keep them healthy, safe, and pure. Please, keep them out of harm's way. I know that You have a plan for each one of them. Help them to follow that plan. Take them by the hand and lead them. Rafe and I will attempt not to get in your way. Allow us to understand what it is that we must do to guide them but not obstruct. I hand them over to You. I entrust them to You every day. Please give me a daily reassurance that You are in control and that they are walking in the right direction.

Last, I would like to pray for myself because I usually neglect moi. I place myself at your feet, Jesus. Allow me to be a good wife and mother. Give me the wisdom to be able to guide my family through the right path, the one that will lead them to You. Thank You, for the morning walks with Rafe, because little by little, You have become a part of those walks. At first, we used to walk mostly in silence. Then, we began to pray. Then, we added gospel discussions to our walks. And now, we are even doing the rosary. It's truly amazing how much we can accomplish in four miles. 

I also want to ask You to give me the time and courage to follow my vocation through my writings. I have been doing the 48 steps to Easter and it has been an awesome journey. I don't know if it has helped anyone, but it has certainly helped me. And for that, I am grateful. Help me to find the right balance between my career, my personal life, and my passion to write. And please, remain at the center of my life because with You in the middle, I can keep all the balls in the air. Thank You for always staying with me in the good and in the bad. 

I love You, Jesus!!!

Week 5: April 1, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Here I am, Lord! I have come to do your will.

I love You, Jesus!!!