Christy's Meditations: Letters to Heaven during Lent: Here I am, Lord

"I have come to do your will.”
-Hebrews 10:9

Week 5: March 28, 2009

Dear Jesus:

Here I am, Lord! I have come to do your will.

I am here in the chapel at Manresa Retreat House keeping You company. I am in front of the Blessed Sacrament, where You are truly present in body and blood. I have come to be with You for a few hours.

First and foremost, I would like to pray for the Emmaus retreat that is taking place right now. I would like to pray for Gema and Ivonne who are facilitating this retreat. Allow them, Jesus, to be transparent so that the retreatants can see You through them. Allow them to lead and unite the team so that together they can represent your whole body. I want to pray for the team so that each one of them can perform the task that they have been assigned with great love. Allow them Jesus to be the best "mouth" or the best "ear" or the best "hand." It doesn't matter if they are a Martha or a Mary. You need them all. I would like to pray for the retreatants. May they open up their ears to hear your message. May they open up their hearts to make You the center of their lives. Allow them to realize that true peace and happiness can only be found in You.

The next thing that I would like to pray for is my family. Thank You for Rafe, my husband, partner, and best friend for the last 28 years. Thank You for giving me the best possible person to walk this journey with me. Guide him in his job to do the best possible work, to always be honest, and to show integrity in everything he does. Help him in his duties as a father. It is not an easy job but he is doing a wonderful one. He loves the kids, he disciplines them when he needs to, he plays with them, and he has their best interest at heart. God, I pray that You keep him healthy, strong, and always by my side. It would be very difficult to walk this journey without him.

Lord, thank You for my children. They are the best gift that You could have ever given me. Please, Jesus, keep them healthy, safe, and pure. Please, keep them out of harm's way. I know that You have a plan for each one of them. Help them to follow that plan. Take them by the hand and lead them. Rafe and I will attempt not to get in your way. Allow us to understand what it is that we must do to guide them but not obstruct. I hand them over to You. I entrust them to You every day. Please give me a daily reassurance that You are in control and that they are walking in the right direction.

Last, I would like to pray for myself because I usually neglect moi. I place myself at your feet, Jesus. Allow me to be a good wife and mother. Give me the wisdom to be able to guide my family through the right path, the one that will lead them to You. Thank You, for the morning walks with Rafe, because little by little, You have become a part of those walks. At first, we used to walk mostly in silence. Then, we began to pray. Then, we added gospel discussions to our walks. And now, we are even doing the rosary. It's truly amazing how much we can accomplish in four miles.

I also want to ask You to give me the time and courage to follow my vocation through my writings. I have been doing the 48 steps to Easter and it has been an awesome journey. I don't know if it has helped anyone, but it has certainly helped me. And for that, I am grateful. Help me to find the right balance between my career, my personal life, and my passion to write. And please, remain at the center of my life because with You in the middle, I can keep all the balls in the air. Thank You for always staying with me in the good and in the bad.

I love You, Jesus!!!