Letters to Heaven: Teach me How to Pray

“Ask, and it will be given you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened." Matthew 7:7-8

September 18, 2008

Dear Jesus:

Here I am, once more doing the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola. I came last year, and since then, I have come a long way. But I still have so much more to go.

Jesus, teach me how to pray. Teach me to open my heart to be able to listen to You. Teach me how to discern your message to me. Teach me how to understand what it is that You want from me.

On one side, You tell me to ask, to seek, to knock, and You will answer me. Yet, on the other side, You tell me to trust You. Maybe what I want, what I'm asking, is not what You want for me. Maybe I want to talk about one thing, but You want to talk about something different. I may have an agenda, but Yours is completely different.

Please, Jesus, help me to be open to your message, whatever that may be. Teach me to open my heart so I learn to listen to You.

I love You, Jesus!!! Good night!


September 19, 2008

Good morning, Jesus:

Here I am, Lord, sitting by the bay. It's 7 am and morning has broken, but the clouds are keeping the sun in hiding. It's the same with my life. The clouds are keeping You in hiding.

I can hear You asking me: "What clouds?" The clouds of worry. The clouds of stress. The clouds of lack of time. The clouds of too many goals. The clouds of perfection. As easy-going as summer was, September comes filled with worries. My stomach has been full of knots. I can't put my finger on what's wrong. All three kids are back in school. Rafe and I are working longer hours than usual. Everything seems fine on the outside, yet by the same token, I feel like a storm is coming.

Jesus, please, clear the clouds from my life. Teach me how to pray. Help me to find more time for You. Help me to realize what is truly important. Help me to figure out what it is that You want from me. Help me to push aside those goals that are not coming from You. Help me to get rid of those things that are keeping me from doing your will.

Lord, help me not to worry so much. Help me to trust You. Help me to trust your plan for my life. Help me also to entrust those that I love into your hands, so that your plan for them can develop without my interference.

Jesus, teach me how to pray.

Here I am, Lord. I have come to do your will.

I love You, Jesus!!!

September 18, 2017

Dear Jesus:

Thank You for teaching me how to pray. I know that I still have a lot to learn, but my prayer life has grown tremendously. My favorite way to pray to You is through the letters that I write You on a regular basis. I still have to master the silence part so I can listen to your voice within my heart. I have a "wondering" mind, so when I try to be silent, my mind goes wondering and it's hard for me to discern whether those intruding thoughts are coming from You or from my imagination. But I'm working on it.

I arrived on that second retreat nine years ago without any expectations. I was a blank book. I allowed You to write in me, whatever You desired of me. I placed myself at your hands to do with me as You wished. I was ready for the unexpected. And oh boy, did You surprise me.

I knocked at your door, very hard, and You opened the door of my heart. I arrived as a blank book and You wrote in the white pages of my heart.

Thank You, Jesus. It's when I have no expectations that You always surprise me.

I love You, Jesus!!!