September 22, 2007
Dear Jesus:
Leave everything and follow You. What a difficult thing. I always struggle with this. How can I possibly leave everything and follow You?
In the bible, that's what it seems that the apostles did. They left their wives, their family, their possessions, and they followed You. But realistically, that's impossible. I'm not going to leave my husband, my children, my home, and follow You. My family places certain restrictions on me as far as time, and even as to where and how I should serve You. I have to be very picky because as You well know, my first commitment is to serve my family as a wife and mother. That's my vocation.
If in addition to that, You have other plans for me, Jesus, You need to let me know what they are before I make a commitment. I will follow You, Jesus. I will follow You. I will let go of the ropes that bind me. I will untie them and follow You to the end of the earth if You need me to.
Today, as opposed to yesterday, You have given me the most beautiful sunrise. And just like You opened up the clouds in the horizon, You have opened up the clouds in my heart. Yesterday, I was feeling such desolation. I was feeling such profound sadness within my heart. But not today, Jesus, not today.
My heart is open, Jesus. My heart is open to receive your message. Help me to be able to discern what your message is. Send me your Holy Spirit to give me the wisdom to be able to hear your message and not be confused with outside forces that may be sending me the wrong message.
Just like Peter was afraid because he felt so unworthy, I also feel very unworthy, Jesus. But here I am, with all my flows and all my misgivings, ready to lay it all down at your feet. I am at your mercy, Lord. I am at your service, ready to follow You.
I love You, Jesus!!!
September 22, 2017
Dear Jesus:
This week, I heard a talk from one of your servants. She said that as Christians, we cannot be lukewarm. I suffer from lukewarmness. It's hard to lay it all down at your feet. It's hard to release everything that binds us, and give it all to You. I cannot allow the world to suffocate me, but at the same time, I live in the world. It's very difficult to disconnect completely from the world.
But I still want to follow You. I want to release my agenda to You, and let You guide my steps. Help me to be a pillar of faith for my family and for my community. If I can be a strong pillar, when the storms of the world threaten my stability, I will be able to resist.
I am at your mercy, Lord. I am at your service. I will follow You.
I love You, Jesus!!!
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