September 10, 2009
Dear Jesus:
Today is Rafi's birthday. He's 21!!! I was in labor 21 years ago at this time. It was the happiest day of my life, the day I became a mommy. When they handed him to me, all nine and a quarter pounds, at 9:47 pm on that Saturday night, I was dancing with joy.
It had been a difficult journey... Follicle studies, fertility drugs, biopsies, a laparoscopy. I went through the fire while trying to become pregnant. Yet at that moment, I knew it had all been worth it.
I lived in constant fear on those first years of his life. I was so scared to lose him. I would run to the doctor at the slightest sniffle. Just three months short of his third birthday, he became very ill with encephalitis. Heaven and earth collided and I knew for sure that my worst nightmare was becoming a reality.
He spent two weeks in the hospital, but thanks to You, he survived. Not only did he survive, there was absolutely no signs in his brain of what he had just endured. Even the radiologist was surprised that the craters he had seen in his brain on the first MRI had completely disappeared within a week. He couldn't even see scars in the second MRI. He even told us that if it had not been him the one that read both results, he would have thought there had been a mistake. I knew in my heart that we had just witnessed a miracle. All the prayers and supplications from all our family, friends, and complete strangers had been answered.
The years that followed were more peaceful, but I always remained on high alert. When he was six years old, he got sick again. I was terrified because the symptoms were similar to the encephalitis. They repeated the MRI and there were no abnormalities whatsoever in his brain. I breathed a sigh of relief.
Now again we have been living through another nightmare. However, I have faith that this too shall pass. Jesus, You have been by Rafi's side during his entire life. You have kept him within your sight all these years. Since the minute he was conceived, You have been looking out for him. The past four and a half months have not been easy but we have survived them because of You.
Today, on Rafi's 21st birthday, I entrust him to You fully and completely. I know that You have a plan for him. I know that he is a very special boy. I knew that since I carried him in my womb. I don't know what your plan for him is because You have not shared it with me, but I know that You will show him little by little and You will lead him in the right direction.
In the meantime, all I pray for is healing. Keep his mind and body healthy. Allow him to become stable so he may continue leading a normal life, so that he can celebrate many more birthdays. At the right moment in time, You will show him the path that he needs to follow.
I am not afraid because You are in charge and You are leading the way. "Be not afraid. I go before You always. Come, follow me, and I will give you rest." I am following You, Jesus, every step of the way. I would not be able to continue the climb without You. I would have given up a long time ago. You give me the courage to go on. Even though I don't know what the future holds, it doesn't matter because the one sure thing I know is that You are part of that future. "Give me only your love and your grace, that's enough for me."
Thank You for the gift of motherhood. All the labor pains and all the pain in my heart is just a tiny particle compared to all the joy I feel because I am a mom.
I love You, Jesus!!!
September 10, 2011
Dear Jesus:
Thank You for 23 years of motherhood! Today is Rafi's birthday and thus, it's a day for Rafe and me to celebrate as well. We have so much to be thankful for. We'll be going to Ana Capri tonight to celebrate, just the two of us.
Rafi returned to Princeton. Every time he goes back, he leaves a big emptiness in the house and in my heart. I should be used to it by now. This is his fifth year but I will never get used to it. I guess once he's settled and with his own family it may get a bit easier. We will see.
It was nice spending the last four weeks with him, the first one in Washington and the last three here at home. He had his yearly check up and it went very well. Even the doctor was very happy at how well he's been doing.
I don't think I have shared with You, Jesus, that Rafi got a very nice offer from Microsoft. Yet, he doesn't want to work in Seattle. He would prefer to work in California. Microsoft does have offices in California. He has been trying to reach out to the teams that are headquartered in California to see if there is any possibility of employment there. Thus far, nothing has come up.
He is more interested in Google or Facebook. He interviewed with both of them over the phone and he passed the first round. Google will probably fly him to California at the end of the month. Today he received an email from Facebook that they want to schedule a second interview. Jesus, I leave it in your hands. You know which company will be the best fit for Rafi. Just like You led him to Princeton, I know that You will lead him to the right company. Please, Jesus, help Rafi to make the right choice. Open doors where You know that he will shine. Close the doors to those companies that will not be in his best interest. Microsoft gave him until November 15th to give them an answer, so the next two months are critical.
I know that Emily will have a big influence in his decision. She has received offers from all three companies. If they are meant to continue walking together, then lead them in the same direction. Otherwise, separate their paths and help them to enjoy today and not worry about tomorrow.
I love You, Jesus!!!
September 10, 2017
Dear Jesus:
Thank You for the gift of Rafi. Thank You for choosing me to be his mother. Twenty-nine years ago, You entrusted him to me, and it has been the biggest adventure of my life.
I am so proud of the young man that He has become. He has overcome huge obstacles due to various health issues. He has always been very bright and very inquisitive. He graduated class valedictorian from Belen and magna cum laude from Princeton. He has been working for Facebook for the past five years. In one year, he will marry his Emily, whom he loves with all his heart. He has accomplished much in spite of very serious issues that he had to overcome. But what makes me most proud of him, is the fact that he never complains. He has never questioned, "why me?" He has adapted to the circumstances and he has made the best of his life. And now, he is passionate about his cause and helping others that are facing the same difficulties that he has faced.
As he celebrates the last year of his twenties, I once more entrust him to You, Jesus. You have always guided him in the right direction, from choosing the right university, and the best company to work for, to picking his perfect mate. Most likely, in his thirties, he will become a dad. I pray that he will enjoy the adventure of fatherhood, as much as I have enjoyed being his mom.
Thank You, Jesus, for the indescribable gift of Rafi.
I love You, Jesus!!!
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